


Until The Wings Unfold

by FollowingButterflies



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angel Dean Winchester, Angel Sam Winchester, Character Death (Not Dean or Cas), F/M, Human Castiel, Hunter Castiel, M/M, Minor Character Death, canon violence, reverse verse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-09
Updated: 2014-01-07
Packaged: 2018-01-03 21:07:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 33,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1073054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FollowingButterflies/pseuds/FollowingButterflies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Within the midst of a angelic war disgraced seraph Dean saves hunter Castiel Novak from spending an eternity in Hell. His actions throw the two men into the middle of the war and risk the lives of everyone he and Castiel hold dear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Updates for this will be every two weeks.   
> [Inspiration Tag](http://casfallen.tumblr.com/tagged/until-the-wings-unfold) and [Original AU Graphics](http://casfallen.tumblr.com/tagged/r%21v)

 

**Prologue**

The shot of the gun was thunderous, the sickening sound ricocheted off the surrounding trees and sent a wave of shock through Castiel as he watched the man ten, maybe fifteen, feet in front of him stiffen and begin to crumple to the ground. Without a second’s hesitation Castiel plunged the knife into the demon’s jugular, twisting viciously without care, and began sprinting towards the man, catching him just in time before the man hit the ground. The man seemed frozen with shock until he looked down at his shirt and realised that the thick cotton shirt was swiftly becoming wet and stained with the deep crimson of blood. His blood.

“Castiel…Castiel.” He started to sob out rapidly as his hands flitted in front of his of his chest where the stain was expeditiously expanding. His face, normally so alive with a smile or a joke, was devoid of every emotion but that of undiluted fear. Castiel looked around the field frantically but there was no one around expect of the demon slowly drowning in a pool of its own blood. “Castiel please…” Gabriel gasped hysterically gripping onto his brother frantically. His grip was almost bruising but the adrenaline from the shock Castiel was feeling was swiftly numbing his whole body.   

“It’s going to be ok Gabe.” Castiel said as Gabriel’s eyes flitted around desperately. “Gabe…Gabe _look_ at me.” Castiel pleaded. Gabriel’s amber, almost gold in some lights, eyes found Castiel’s though they were swimming in fear. “Gabe…it’s going to be ok...I promise.” Castiel said looking down and trying greatly to ignore the expanding blood on Gabriel’s shirt. The crimson of the blood darkening the deep forest green flannel shirt that had once been Castiel’s that he’d given to Gabriel a few years before on a hunt in Wichita. It had been slightly too big on Gabriel’s frame when Castiel had first given it to him though over the past three years Castiel had watched Gabriel grow into it. He didn’t know why he was thinking this, maybe it was because thinking about anything else, acknowledging what was happening, was too painful for Castiel to even contemplate.

He couldn’t watch this happen again. He couldn’t let another loved one die in front of him. He couldn’t have the blood of someone he loved soak his clothing again but he couldn’t leave Gabriel. He couldn’t let Gabriel die alone. He shouldn’t be letting Gabriel die at all.

Gabriel’s breathing was becoming laboured as Castiel looked up towards the sky. His mother had told him as a child that he was blessed, that angels watched over him and his siblings but nothing looked back but the inky black sky littered with barely visible stars. _Please, please someone help_ Castiel begged though who he was begging to he’d long forgot. Gabriel’s grip on Castiel slackened and he was now as white as bone. Castiel could feel a sob rising in the back of his throat but he wouldn’t let Gabriel become more overwhelmed by fear from seeing his brother cry.

“Castiel…Castiel I feel cold.” Gabriel practically whispered.

“You’ll be ok…I’ll get Samandriel…I’ll get whoever I need to get and we’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.” Castiel said trying to think of anything to keep Gabriel calm.

“I’m going to sleep now Castiel.” Gabriel said slowly closing his eyes. His breathing became more laboured for a moment before his whole body stilled. The grip on Castiel loosened and Gabriel’s hand slid from Castiel’s skin to the ground. Even though it made the smallest of sounds to Castiel it was utterly deafening, it was the only sound he could hear apart from his own strenuous breathing as he held back his tears. He had to be strong for Gabriel; he had to be strong for his baby brother even though Gabriel was long gone.

“I’ll be here when you wake up Gabe, I promise.” Castiel managed to stammer out between the sob he finally let out though he knew his brother could no longer hear him. He clung onto to Gabriel, not caring that his own shirt was now being stained with his brother’s blood. “I’ll be here Gabriel.” Castiel said between choking gasps for air. A sickening gurgling laugh sounded from across the field and as he looked up Castiel saw the slowly dying demon looking at him, looking at him and laughing.

“This is what happens…this is the price you have to pay.” The demon spat out. Anger blinded Castiel as he pulled himself away from Gabriel’s cold body and tore across the field. The colt was in his hand before he even thought about, pressing up against the demon’s temple. “Do it, there are many of us and one less Novak in this world, do you really think I care if you kill me?”

“You could have left this body at any time, why stay here in pain?” Castiel asked because even though the shocked filled adrenaline was still coursing through Castiel’s veins he was still his father’s son and his father had always told him to question everything, never accept something for what it seemed to be because that was when the knife was plunged into your back.

“What’s a little pain when I can watch a Novak die?” the demon snarled. Castiel pressed his gun further into the demon’s temple and didn’t even flinch as he pressed the trigger. The loud, resounding gun shot rang through the field though it did not bring Castiel any relief. The most important thing his father had ever taught him was to protect his siblings; protect Samandriel and Gabriel until the very end and with a staggering realisation Castiel had to accept that he had failed; he had failed the most important task his father had ever given him.

He could not even bare to look over where Gabriel’s body lay. Gabriel’s…Gabriel’s body. His brother was no longer a living soul…his brother was gone. The weight of this truth hit Castiel like a punch to the chest and he was finding it hard to breathe. How was the going to explain this to Samandriel or Anna? How could he even look them in the eyes and tell that he’d let Gabriel die in front of him?

At the end of it all Castiel had failed his family.

-

He did not stop for nearly three hours. For the entire car journey he had refused to look back, refuse the think about how Gabriel’s body lay on the backseat of his car. He kept driving, music blaring loudly to stop the screaming in his head. He heard his father’s voice yelling at him over and over again. He heard his mother sobbing about losing a son and he heard Samandriel question repeatedly over how Castiel could have let Gabriel be hurt. He heard this until he thought he was going to go insane, that was when he’d turned the radio on to any random station that got signal and turned it up as loud as it would go.

Finally the crossroad came into view and Castiel parked the car on a nearby patch of dirt.  

The ingredients needed were all stored under the false bottom of Castiel’s trunk. They had never been needed to be used before but Anna had always said it was useful to keep them in the car. Castiel couldn’t help but think about how she had been right in the end. Burying them in the dirt Castiel’s breath stalled as he waited.

“Well isn’t this an interesting turn of events? Huh Castiel?” a feminine voice called out with a sneering drawl. With trepidation Castiel turned round to see a curvaceous woman standing several feet away. She folded her leather clad arms across her chest and cocked an eyebrow. “I could curtsy, after all I am standing in front of a so-called legend but I think that would be over doing it, don’t you?” she asked.

“I assume you realise why I called you.” Castiel said wanting this to be over as soon as possible.

“You’ve really shaken things up downstairs though I suppose when you kill the demon that _finally_ brought down one of the Novak brothers it makes an impression. We always assumed it would be the youngest, we never though the first to fall would be Gabriel himself.”

“Don’t talk about my brothers.” Castiel hissed narrowing his eyes.

“Oh please Castiel, that’s the only reason you are here. You want me to bring your brother back to life don’t you? It’s incredible obvious and rather cliché Novak.” The demon said. “What will you give me Castiel Novak? What will you give me for your brother’s life?” she asked cocking an eyebrow with a tilt of her head. “What do you think is worth me letting your brother live?” she then asked almost mockingly. Castiel grounded his teeth together and the demon let out a high pitched laughter one would ascertain to that of a child’s, not a creature of Hell.

“Anything, I’d give anything.” Castiel spat out. The demon blinked in surprise.

“ _Anything_? That’s a very foolish thing to say Castiel because I could easily take anything I wanted from you, no matter of the repercussions.” She said looking from Castiel feet upwards until she reached his face, it were almost like he were one of the prized cows the Castiel’s grandfather used to take to the county fair when he was young. “Castiel Novak, the infamous son of James Novak, trained to be a fearless hunter from the day he could stand without falling on his ass. Trained to hold a gun just as his motor skills were kicking, am I right? A boy who was raised knowing more about the supernatural and theology than popular culture. Well, well now look at you, practically on your knees begging a demon for help and promising her _anything_ all for someone else. I would rather prefer it if you were on your knees but I guess a lady can’t have everything she wants.” She added as her gaze went back down raking over Castiel’s body.

“My brother-” Castiel spat out.

“Oh I know that you’re doing this all for your little brother’s life, your precious brother’s life. It is the most important thing in the world to you and you’ll fight for it until the very end. Castiel Novak a dedicated family man even if his family or loved ones are constantly leaving or dying on him. Fearless to all Hell’s creatures, a ruthless killer and a ready-made little warrior.” With a sickening smirk the demon looked up, her red eyes meeting Castiel’s blue, and tilted her head. “You know I think you’ll fit in _very_ well.”

Fear gripped Castiel because a demon smirking was never a good thing. “Fit in _where_?” he asked.

“I have your price Castiel Novak.” The demon said as her smirk altered until it was a wide, shark like, smile. “We will let your brother live. He can continue with his pitiful little life and frolic through fields of wild flowers or whatever is that you do when you’re not getting in our way. For your brother’s life we shall take you. That is our deal Castiel, do you agree to it?”

“Take me to _where_ exactly?” Castiel practically snarled.

“To Hell Castiel, where else would we take you?” the demon once again filled the road with her mocking and tinkling laugh.  Castiel’s blood ran cold at her words. He had grown up learning about every single aspect of Hell, every single torturous horror that would happen to the soul of those banished to the desolate wasteland, a wasteland of fire and brimstone according to the teaching of his father. His father had been so resolute in his teachings; he made sure that Castiel knew right from wrong, good from evil. The souls twisted by evil were certainly evil, the souls twisted and mangled until they became the very thing that Castiel hunted. The thought of what he would endure in Hell sicken Castiel to his stomach but a life without his brother, even a day without knowing his brother was alive and safe, sickened him even more so.

Gabriel was his brother, one of the only unceasing constants in Castiel’s tumultuous and chaotic way of life. Every single teaching that Castiel had received from his father always boiled down to one thing, family was the thing that matter more than anything and if needed you would die to protect your family. It was that simple. Castiel had promised his father he would always care for the family. He grown up being denied of so many things but the love from his family was not one of them and that was the only thing that was important right now.

“Well Castiel? What is it going to be?”

With a deep breath, making his chest heave, Castiel’s eyes fixed upon the demon’s startling eyes, the crimson almost dancing with merriment over the deal being negotiated. He could not imagine life without his brothers, without any of his family, and that would not become a reality as long as Castiel could still draw breath.

“Deal” Castiel said sighing heavily. “But you will give me time to say goodbye to my family.”

“You’re hardly in a position to make demands Castiel. We will return Gabriel’s soul and let him live but you don’t get time to waltz around the country saying your goodbyes. As soon as we kiss on it I’m dragging your soul to Hell. No negotiations.”

“I get to say goodbye to Gabriel.” Castiel said sternly. “He will never forgive me for this if I don’t talk to him before.”

“That’s adorable Castiel, it really is.” The demon said with that sickeningly tinkling laugh. “I might get a few kicks out of seeing that little meeting unfold.”

“You’re a heartless bitch.” Castiel snarled.

“Oh your shameless flattery will only get you so far Castiel.” The demon said as she actually fluttered her eyelashes, which was no doubt in a sarcastic manner. “You get one minute. One minute or nothing at all. Deal?”

“Deal.” Castiel said. There was no way he’d get any longer even though he knew five minutes were not long enough to explain everything to Gabriel.   

“Now comes my favourite part.” The demon practically purred as she slunk closer to Castiel. Revulsion rippled through Castiel’s body as the demon trailed a hand delicately up his side. The hand came to a stop at Castiel’s jaw as the demon drew their lips closer. “Your brother’s life, one minute to say goodbye and then you are ours Castiel.” The demon whispered before bringing her lips to Castiel’s to seal the deal. Disgust swelled up into Castiel’s throat but he fought it back. As soon as possible he pulled away and battled against the vomit rising up his throat. The demon smirked sadistically and motioned over to Castiel’s car.    

Gabriel’s wet sounding cough sent jolts of shock through Castiel’s body. Tearing his eyes away from the crossroad demon he hurried over to the car as his brother let out a pained groan from the back seat. Colour slowly returned to Gabriel’s face as Castiel pulled open the door and stared down at his brother.

“Castiel? Castiel what…what’s going on? What the hell happened?” Gabriel asked trying to sit up. His face contorted with pain as he sifted in the seat, still staring up at Castiel. He glanced down and seemed to notice the dried blood that had drenched his shirt only a few hours before. “What happened Castiel?” he asked even more frantically than before.

“Gabe we don’t have much time.” Castiel said hastily as he helped Gabriel up. “Can you stand?” he asked as Gabriel winced again.

“Much time until what?” Gabriel questioned brushing off Castiel’s question. “What have you done Castiel?” Gabriel asked in a distraught voice. He looked around the surrounding area and Castiel could see the realisation sink in. “Castiel what the hell have you done?” Gabriel almost spat out.

“I did what I needed to do and what I thought was the right thing. I could not let you die Gabriel.” Castiel said. It was vital that Gabriel understood this or this would have all been for nothing.

“No! What was the deal? What did you give up? Castiel you need to tell me!” Gabriel cried gripping onto Castiel’s arms. “Castiel! What did you give up?” he added even more frantically than before. Looking away Castiel tried not to show the terror that was slowly settling in his stomach. The grip on his arms tightened even more so forcing him to look back at Gabriel. “What did you give up?” Gabriel pressed. Castiel looked away again, unable to say the words. “No…”

“Gabriel I had no choice. My job was always to protect you and Samandriel.”

“And you think that by giving yourself up you’re doing that? What were you thinking?”

“I was thinking about how I made a promise to our parents to always be there for you and Samandriel. I made a promise to them and I made it my duty to always be there for you! We hunt the supernatural creatures because that is our duty but standing by and letting you die is not what I was meant to do.” Castiel said. “All I was thinking about was how you could not die!”

“Did you ever think it was all part of a high plan?” Gabriel questioned with a cocked eyebrow.

“Don’t bring God into this Gabriel because he would not let you die like that! He would not let you bleed out in my arms Gabriel. What’s done is done and I had no choice.” Castiel snapped not caring how furious Gabriel looked.

“Time is up Castiel.” The demon called from where she had been stood watching the interaction between Castile and his brother. Gabriel’s face paled and his anger is so palpable it caused Castiel’s chest to aggressively ache. “Tick tock Castiel, tick tock.” The demon simpered crossing her arms over her chest just like she had.

“Gabriel I’m sorry that I had to do this. I’m sorry but you have to be there for Samandriel. You have to explain this to him and Anna and tell them how sorry I am. You have to do that.” Castiel said hurriedly. There was so much more he could say, so much more he wanted to say but there was no. He was out of time. He heard a deep growl, guttural and primal, as invisible paws shift the gravel littering the road. _Hellhounds_ Castiel thought with sickening realisation. “Gabriel, please, you need to find Anna. Find Anna then go to Boston to get Samandriel. You need to explain what happen-”

“You haven’t told me everything that has happened!” Gabriel snapped.

“Gabriel listen to me. You need to find Anna and Samandriel and stay with them. You have to keep a watch over Samandriel.” Castiel said firmly. “Nothing can happen to any of you, you have to stay safe, do you hear me?”

“Castiel-”

“Gabriel for once in your damn life will you just listen to someone other than yourself? Look after Anna and Samandriel and stay safe or this will have all been for nothing.” Castiel said as the vicious growling drew near. “Do you promise me?” Castiel asked. Gabriel bit his lip so hard it tore the skin. “Gabriel please just look after them. Please.”

“I can’t promise anything…but I’ll try.” Gabriel said with a shake of his head. He never could promise anything either. Gabriel had always been too headstrong, too stubborn and rebellious. The growling coming from the Hellhound intensified and a loud snarl was the last thing Castiel heard before pain ripped through his leg as he fell to the ground. He heard Gabriel yell as pain coursed through his body.

“Gabriel go.” Castiel ordered. He had watched Gabriel die. He would never forget how all the warmth had left Gabriel’s body leaving him colder than stone. Castiel would go to his grave remembering the ghostly pallor of his brother’s face as he’d died in his arms. Gabriel could not be made to bare that trauma. Castiel would not let it happen. “Gabriel I mean it you need to _run_.” He barked between gritted teeth as pain seared through him.

“No, you stayed with me so I’m going to stay with you.” Gabriel said with grim determination.. “I’m not going to leave you Castiel.”

“Gabriel just listen and run.” Castiel let out between cries of pain as yet another rabid bite sank into his life. “Just listen and-” Castiel was cut off by a vicious snarl, blinding pain to his chest and thick wet heat spreading across his chest. “Gabriel please just-”

“Castiel-”

A deep snarl. Burning pain. Castiel’s thoughts were becoming disjointed.

“Gabriel ru-”

Snarling. Agony. Darkness was clouding Castiel’s vision.

“Castiel I’m sorr-”

“ _I’m_ sorry.” Castiel coughed out. “Gabriel I’m sorry.” He let out.

The last thing he saw before darkness washed over him was the anguished agony in Gabriel’s eyes. One more nightmare that would never leave him.

 _Dear God…whoever is listening…whoever is there…help me._      

-

Hundreds of miles away in a creaking and slightly run down dorm room a cell phone blared loudly from underneath a pillow despite it being well past midnight. The phone belonged to the sandy haired nineteen year old who had been minutes away from sleep until the phone rang. Samandriel rolled onto his back and glared up at the ceiling. Whoever was calling him needed a damn good reason for ripping him away from well needed sleep. 

“Answer your phone man. I have a lecture on coronary aortic aneurysms first thing tomorrow and if I fall asleep I'm going to get a book thrown at me.” A grumpy voice said from across the room. The voice belonged to his roommate Kevin who was the biggest grouch unless he had coffee in his hand or was asleep. 

Samandriel untangled himself from his blankets and groped around under his pillow for his phone. Years of living with his family taught him to always answer his phone no matter what the time. Grumbling to himself as he rubbed crusted sleep from his eyes Samandriel looked down at the screen and frowned when he saw Gabriel's name. Gabriel never called him. It was always Castiel or Anna. Something had to be wrong. He hit answer and gingerly said hello as he pulled himself out of bed.

“If you turn on the main light I will bash your head in with my MacBook.” Kevin grumbled from under his blankets. 

“I'll help you hide the body. There’s enough chemicals in the skills lab to make sure no one would ever find him” Inias, his other roommate, muttered from his bed. Samandriel shook his head at the pair of them a grabbed a hooded jacket before going out into the hallway

“Gabriel are you there?” He said when he realised that Gabriel had yet to speak. “Gabriel?” He pressed. This was not good. Something had to have happened. “Gabriel say something.”

“It's about Castiel...” Gabriel finally choked out sounding as though he'd spent the last day sobbing. Samandriel's stomach plummeted and he gripped the nearest railing to steady himself. Of his siblings he looked up to Castiel the most.

“Gabriel...tell me what happened.” Samandriel said as he closed his eyes to prepare himself for whatever Gabriel was about to say. 

“It's all my fault...all my fault.” Gabriel said. All of his bravado was gone and Samandriel could barely recognise the voice of his comedic elder brother.  

“What is all your fault? Gabe please tell me...what happened?” Samandriel said pleading. 

“He...he...Castiel...he's dead...he's dead and it's all my fault.” Gabriel choked out and Samandriel's grip on his phone slackened until he nearly dropped it. Here had to be a mistake. There had to be. His brother couldn't be dead. Castiel was too strong, too skilled to die...he couldn't be dead. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry. It's all my fault."

“How?” Was the only word he was able to let out.

“Hellhounds...” Gabriel said. Samandriel’s blood ran cold. “He…Samandriel...it's my fault.”

“Call Anna.” Samandriel finally managed say after several moments of deep breathing. “Send me your coordinates and I'll be there as soon as possible.” he said firmly because it was easier to slip the role of the leader, the role Castiel had so easily slipped into after their father’s death, than it was to let himself become overcome by the news of his eldest brother’s death. “Don’t do anything rash or stupid.” Samandriel said before hanging up and storming back into his dormitory. Kevin groaned at the light coming in from the hallway and once Samandriel turned on the main light to the room his swore loudly.

“Light. Off. Now.” He grumbled while Samandriel pulled his worn duffel bag from under his bed. The bag had belonged to Castiel when he was young but Samandriel tried not to think about that. He couldn’t think about that at this point. “Samandriel turn the light…why are you throwing shit into a bag? Where are you going?”

“Has the pressure finally got to you? You’re not going to throw yourself into the river are you?” Inias mumbled as he blinked against the light.

“No…no…I have to go…I have to go and find my brother.” Samandriel said grabbing several shirts and hooded jackets. He threw them into the bag along with sneakers and a pair of boots.

“Your brother? I didn’t even know you had a brother.” Inais said sitting up in his bed. “Are you ok? You look like you’re about to be sick.” He asked with concern. Samandriel shrugged as he picked up his laptop, laptop charger, phone and phone charger before putting them into the bag along with his clothing.

“My…my brother rang me and I need to go.” Samandriel said. He could tell his room-mates that his brother had died but then he would need to explain what he family did for a living. 

“Now? It’s two in the morning.” Kevin pointed out. Samandriel shrugged yet again and pulled his bag over his shoulder. “You’re actually going now? You’re insane.”

“Yeah I need to go now. It’s kind of serious.” Samandriel said as he pulled his jacket off the nearest chair. He patted it down until he found his car keys. “I’ll email you or text you once I’ve found my brother.” He said absentmindedly as he made his way to the door.

“Samandriel!” Inais called. “Um…good luck?” he said shooting Kevin a confused look. Samandriel couldn’t blame him really. He’d never mentioned Gabriel or Castiel. It was kind of hard to tell your roommates that your only siblings drove across America hunting down the things that went bump in the night.

“Thanks I guess.” Samandriel said before turning out the light. He raced out the dormitory towards where his car was parked. The car was crappy but Castiel and Gabriel had brought it for him when he’d onto into school so he saw it as his prized possession. It wasn’t until he’d gotten into the car that he realised he was still in his pyjamas. He looked down at the dark cotton sweatpants he’d pulled on an hour before and saw that he was shaking. Balling his hands into fists he rested them on his thighs and took several deep breaths to try and regulate his breathing. He couldn’t cry because he had to be strong. Castiel has always told him to be strong no matter what. No matter what was happening he knew he had to be strong for his family. He had to be strong even if part of his family was now long gone.   


	2. Part One

 

  **Part One**

Searing and indescribable pain tore through burnt, blistered and cracked skin. The burns were not from heat but from the freezing cold. People always assumed that Hell was a fiery pit of flames, sulphur and brimstone yet it was quite the opposite. Instead of the flame and the heat that so many believe it to be it was a barren wasteland of chilling and suffocating fog. The endless empty feeling of eternity clung to every single particle and seeped into the bones until it was impossible to feel nothing but crippling pain and disparity.

Being alone was never an option but the unbearable sting of loneliness hung over every marred soul like a ghost slowly tearing away at the flesh and the soul until both were left raw and ruined.

A whip lashed down onto the bloody slab of the back long since mutilated from the daily torture that no human on Earth should ever have to see that alone had done unto them. He questioned how he could possibly endure this agonizing act of cruelty and whether his cries to God were going unheard. A slow and lazy laughed bounced off the walls sending shivers down the spines of whoever heard it. After all, only one person laughed in Hell and he was the one holding the whip.

“I am beginning to become bored by your continuous refusal regarding my offer. The truth is that men greater than you took up these tools to rid themselves of the pain. You may think you are being honourable by refusing but really you’re just turning yourself into another pathetic martyr.” The whip holder said stopping his torture to move round the body of the man before him. The whip holder crouched down and peered into the startling blue of the man’s eyes and gave him a sneering smile. “You could just make this all easier on yourself by just changing that frustrating answer then we could both get up and stop this little daily rendezvous. I could make your infinite stay here an enjoyable one if you just let me.” He added.

“My answer will stay the same for as long as I am here.” The young man snarled.

“An eternity of saying ‘no’ is going to become very dull very quickly.” The whip bearer said moving back to his original position. “One day my words will finally sink into that lumpish hunter brain of yours and you’ll realise that your stay down here can be vastly improved by just saying one word; yes.” He added in the same dull tone he always used

“Bite me.” The young man hissed venomously. The whip bearer laughed again.

“Oh feisty! Maybe later, maybe later.” He said in a quasi-coquettish lilt before bringing the whip back down upon the young man’s back opening up a brand new wound. “Did you know how much I do love an easy bleeder?” the whip bearer said to himself almost gleefully. “And you Castiel Novak must be my favourite easy bleeder of the lot. There is something special about breaking your soul until it is irreparable. I do enjoy it so.”

Castiel breathed in deeply, desperately trying to ignore the cloying stench of his own blood and braced himself for the pain he knew was inevitable. He had lost count how many days he’d been in Hell, how many times he’d been broken and remade upon the rack or how many times he’d gone through the unbearable notion that this was for eternity. He had lost count of how many times he’d cried out for his family when really he knew that no one could come for him, no one could come to save him.

He had long since stopped praying to God, his time as a hunter had proven that there wasn’t anyone up there listening to the prayers of those on Earth. His faith in God had long since disappeared but praying had been such a constant in his life he found himself still doing so. He did not even know whom it was that he was praying to anymore but the familiar action gave him some of the only confront that was possible to find within the freezing wasteland ripping his soul apart.

 _Please someone free me from this._  

-

_The Aftermath Of A War_

The air was thick with the unmistakable aftermath of a recent battle. The smell of freshly spilt blood clung to every surface which would have unsettled the stomach of a human yet no humans were present. With a ruffle of wings, feathers askew from close combat, his hold on the blade in his hand relaxed as Dean let out an exhausted and remorseful lament.

There was no reason behind the slaughter of other angels. There was no reason for Dean to carry on spilling the blood of angels who ‘dared’ to question the inner workings of Heaven, well at least there was reason Dean could think of. Those above him had given him countless reasons and it had been instilled in him to stand straight and be a good little soldier. There had been a time when he’d fought against that but he had paid his price and learnt his lesson.

Throwing his blade to the ground Dean took in the sight before him with disgust. The scorched marks of wings littered the ground. The fighting had been going on for long Dean found it hard to remember a time when there had been peace in Heaven. For a moment the want that he felt for the time he spent on Earth overwhelmed him. He missed the quiet and the peace but he knew thinking that way was dangerous.

“This whole thing is pointless.” Dean muttered as Adam appeared at his side. His kin had a bloody wound on the side of his face and several of his feathers had been torn from his wings.

“I hate to break it to you but there has never been a point to this.” Adam muttered back as he surveyed the endless field marred with fallen angels. “They’ll want us back soon.”

“Dan-” An angel who went by the name of Adriel said walking up to Dean. She did not look at Adam, instead choosing to only acknowledge Dean.

“What?” Dean snapped interrupting her.

“All garrisons need to return now. Raphael wants full reports and the names of the fallen. You and your garrison’s presence is required.” Adriel said. Adriel’s female vessel was wiry but strong looking and Dean knew how vicious Adriel could be in battle.

“The status report is that he’s still a giant dick.” Dean said sheathing his blade. Adriel’s wings ruffled with annoyance as she glared up at Dean. “You can leave now.” Dean snapped at the disgruntled looking angel.

Adriel’s face hardened until it was almost like stone. “I don’t respond to your-” she started to say.

“If you push me I will pull rank or stab you in the neck. The choice is yours.” Dean barked. Adriel narrowed her eyes but nodded. Adriel didn’t approve of Dean in any way, shape or form but she was a stickler for the rules and Dean was a higher ranking angel than she was despite everything. “Go find the rest of your freaking flock and return to the damn shepherd.” Dean said when made Adriel made no attempt to move. Dean opened his mouth to try and cut Adriel down again but a pain stricken voice reverberated through Dean’s brain.     

_Please._

Dean winced violently from the voice practically screaming inside his head.

_Someone free me from this_

“Dean?” Adam asked with concern as he moved to be by Dean’s side. “It’s happening again.” It wasn’t a question anymore. Adam had been fighting alongside him for long enough to translate so many of Dean’s facial expressions.

“Dean?” Dean’s other garrison member Sam asked appearing at Dean side. “It’s happening again?” he asked again with alarm.

“This has gone on long enough.” Dean said rubbing his temple. It would do nothing to silence the praying but it was a habit he’d picked up thanks to several humans he’d been around for the years. “There’s gotta be some kind of plan. The guy is being tortured _daily_ by that asshole down there. He doesn’t belong there.”

“I haven’t heard anything. There’s no plan as far as I know, not that I know much of what goes on up there anymore.” Sam answered solemnly. “And according to Raphael there’s still no word from Michael so we have to keep following Raphael’s orders. Michael hasn’t-”

“No, I’ve heard nothing from him in years.” Dean said still wincing as Castiel’s prayers whittled down to next to nothing. “There’s gotta be a plan though. We can’t just let the man rot down there.”

“The fate of  Castiel Novak is hardly any of your concern.” Adriel said. Dean hadn’t even realised she was still there. Anger bristled inside of him as he looked over at the stoic angel.

“Have you heard his prayers? Have you?” Dean asked Adriel with a snap. “Because I have! I’ve had to hear every single agonised prayer of his and I’ve had to listen as they dwindled down to fuck all. I’ve had to listen as his soul was ripped into and his faith all but torn away! From where I’m stood that is a good enough fucking reason for us to pull him out of that cesspool!”

“Watch your tone here boy” An angel commanded from the far end of the field. Dean fought against the shudder that rippled through his body as the angel marched towards him. Raphael carried on walking until he was mere inches away from Dean’s face, a deep frown cemented into his face.

“Sir I’m sorry, I stayed behind to round up the garrisons. Danyael’s garrison were about to report to you.” Adriel said as her posture straightened as a sign of respect. Raphael didn’t even spare a glance in her direction.

“You might like to think that you have even a grain of authority here but you don’t.” Raphael snarled with his teeth bared insidiously at Dean. Dean could feel his brother Sam grow rigid with protectiveness next to him as it was well known that getting on the wrong side of the high standing angel like Raphael earned you a one way ticket to being heavily disciplined. There was a time when Sam would have installed the same amount of respect but…no, Dean couldn’t think about that now. He couldn’t let his guilt cloud the matter at hand.

“Raphael-” he tried to say but Raphael cut into him.

“We don’t know how mangled Castiel Novak’s soul is; if we free him we could be freeing pure evil.” Raphael said.  

“That’s pure bullshit. I've heard his prayers.” Dean snapped. “Just let us save him; it cannot possibly be God’s word to have him left there. Let us go and save him.”

“Are you offering your services there?” Adriel, said scoffing loudly. Dean whipped round to glare her harshly.

“I seem to be the only one who is doing so.” Dean pointed out. Adriel snorted loudly as if the mere thought of Dean storming Hell was laughable. “You make it sound like I’m powerless, like I’ve never even held a blade or fought in a war in my life. I’ve seen more wars than you could think of.”

“Wars that you helped in causing.” Adriel said and Dean couldn’t help but think that was either incredible stupid of her or incredible cocky seeing as Dean was the stronger and more skilled one out of the pair of them.

“Give me one reason to stab you and I will.” Dean snarled at Adriel’s smirking face. "In fact I don't even need a reason."

“Hold your tongue here _boy_.” Raphael snapped. “We let you lead that pathetic little garrison of yours, true, but away from your devoted sycophants that martyr persona you have spent more than a millennia building up is nothing but a mask to hide the worthless and lowly being you are. We all remember who you are and what you did, what you did to get here.” Raphael said.

“Dean!” Sam cried grabbing onto Dean’s arms to pull him back before he could launch himself at Raphael.

“Get him out of here.” Raphael hissed throwing a look of contempt at Dean’s general direction. Sam’s hold on Dean’s arm tightened and he was joined on the other side by Adam. Raphael threw Dean one last disdainful look as Sam and Adam pulled Dean from the battlefield.

Many up in Heaven had lamented over Castiel’s deal but deep down Dean could understand what had driven the man to give up his soul, give up his life, for that of his brother’s. Just because he understood why the man had made the deal did not mean that Dean agreed with this Castiel rotting and becoming slowly mutilated by the twisted and repulsive hand of Zachariah.

Castiel Novak needed to be saved. If no one else would break into Hell to save Castiel Novak then Dean would just have to take matter into his own hands and save the man himself. It would be dangerous and reckless but he could no longer stand by and let the other angel sit around like politicians spouting utter bullshit.

They hadn’t been the ones who heard Castiel Novak’s desperate prayers when he had first been sent to Hell. They hadn’t heard him cry out for his family, for his loved ones and they hadn’t heard him scream out in pain as Zachariah repeatedly broke both his body and his soul with every tools Hell possessed.

Dean knew what he needed to do. He pulled himself out of the grasp of his brothers and took off across the vast battlefield removing his gauntlets as he went.  

“Dean! Dean stop!” Sam called after him.  

“You think I’m just going to sit around and wait for God only knows how many more months while everything on Earth goes to shit? I am done with waiting on their damn orders.” Dean snapped as he continued to march almost blind with rage.

“Dean if you’re going to do what I think you’re going to do then it’s dangerous and breaking more rules than I would even want to count!” Sam said grabbing onto Dean’s arm again with such force that it would bruise if possible. Dean gave him a scathing look as he ripped his arm from Sam’s vicelike grip.

“Sam you’re my brother, you’ve been with me through every battle and you’re my closest kin but you’re an archangel so you have a different agenda to me.”

Sam looked pained as he sighed with fatigue. Rankings in Heaven had never gotten between them before and Dean knew it was a low blow bringing up Sam’s ranking over him but it was the only thing he could think to do. “I don’t…Dean I really don’t” Sam said. “I have my orders and I have to follow them even if I don’t agree with them. You’re my brother, you’re my leader but I have my orders.”

“Yeah well I doubt sitting around on your damn cloud while an innocent man is tortured within an inch of his life is the kind of order I would want to follow.”

“We have our rules-”

“Screw the goddamn fucking rules Sam!” Dean roared. “Screw every single rule we have up there.”

“Dean that kind of talk-” Adam said hurriedly.

“I know what it sounds like Adam; I’ve said things like it before and we all know what happened back when I said them but I can’t do it anymore. We stood back when countless demons pulled themselves out of Hell and possess innocent people, we stood back and watched as the humans fucked up over and over again and we stood back when Castiel sold his soul and ended up rotting in Hell. I can’t just stand by and watch something like that happen yet again, I just can’t do it.”

“Dean-” Adam said sounding pained.

“Don’t you see Adam? _This_ is why Jo left; this is why she all but ripped out her own grace and left us all.” Dean said. He watched with guilt rising in his stomach as agony shot through Adam’s entire body until it reached his face which was bathed in distress. Jo’s distain for the goings on in Heaven which caused her to disappear without a trace was still too painful for either of them to talk about in full even though it had happened nearly twenty years prior, it was still just as raw as the day she said goodbye to both of them. Adam had taken it hardest of all as he was closest to her and Dean had always suspected that his feelings even deeper.

Adam practically choked out “Dean-” before he was cut off by Dean raising his hand.

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry for bringing up Jo but I have to do this, I don’t need you to help me-”

“You will get yourself killed if you go by yourself Dean.” Sam said firmly “You need us to help you.”

“Sam there is no way I’m asking either of you to help me.”

“Why? Because you know you could easily be killed by doing this?”

“No Sam” Dean said with a sigh “It’s because I already hurt you enough in the past with my actions and I don’t ever want to cause you that much pain ever again. Jo’s disappearance is enough to deal with. I couldn’t live with myself if I got any of you killed.” He added and Sam’s jaw clenched at Dean’s words. He did not say anything even though Dean knew Sam desperately wanted to do so. “I can’t let either of you get hurt, I’d never forgive myself.”

“I don’t agree with you but you know I’ll follow your orders until the very end even if I don’t want to or think they’re right.” Sam said. With a deep sigh Sam pulled an ancient blade from his jacket pocket and handed it to Dean. “You might need this.” He said. Dean looked down at the demon blade and his stomach flipped with revulsion. Adam quietly swore and looked at Sam with kind of frightened awe.

“How did you get hold of this?” Adam asked Sam while Dean looked at his closest kin with caution. The weapons of both Heaven and Hell that the angels had tracked down were normally kept under strict guard. Sam held a lot of importance in Heaven but still getting hold of the weapon would have taken a lot

“It doesn’t matter. I knew Dean would end up doing something reckless and would need all the help he could possibly get.” Sam said closing Dean’s hand over the hilt of the blade. “You shouldn’t be doing this on your own but there’s nothing I can do to make you change your mind and I know that. Adam and I will keep a direct line open if you need us.”

“We won’t be able to distract the others for long if word gets back to them about this but we can damn well try.” Adam said. “Dean just make sure-”

“I know, make sure to be careful.”

“You’re never careful.” Adam shot back rolling his eyes diffusing some of the tension that had built.

“Just try to return home in one piece.” Sam said pulling Dean into a rough hug. Sam clung on for several moments before letting Dean go. Despite what several said he was not a stupid man by any means, he was fully aware that he could easily be walking towards his death. He could easily fail at his task but he could no longer stand by and let an innocent man rot in Hell. Trepidation flooded his body as he saw Adam and Sam’s worried looks but deep down he knew he was right to do this.

-

  
_Beyond The Wyoming Hell Gate_  

The corridors were endless, bleak and sent shivers of revulsion down Dean’s spine. Everything inside his body told him that he did not belong here. His grace was thrumming under his skin and the wings he so often resented were almost burning to spread out and help him flee form this place. He fought against it and pressed on. He was here to save a soul so bright and pure it had been screaming for salvation for months.

Motion behind him drew Dean out of his thoughts and he ducked just in time to avoid a knife being plunged into his neck. Black eyes narrowed as they took Dean in but he did not give them time to react, lunge again or even call for back up. Slamming his palm against the demon's forehead Dean was aware a blinding flash as the body crumpled to the floor, their skull making a sickening crack as it hit the stone of the floor. 

The demon blade in his belt would have sufficed but if Dean did not have to use it then he wouldn’t, it was a weapon not made for an angel and the use of it still made Dean uncomfortable even if it was a useful blade. The relic, which had been thought to be lost millennia before, had been discovered in the late sixties during a purge of Earth in which angels had spent nearly a decade sweeping earth for countless weapons created by both Heaven and Hell. The blade had been made in Hell and it seemingly enjoyed being back there even if it was going to destroy those who had made it. 

A jolt of searing pain coursed through Dean for a moment and yet no one had attacked him, it was his grace. His grace was pulling him down the long, sweeping corridor towards a heavy black door. He could practically hear Castiel Novak’s soul screaming, screaming to be saved from his prison. It sounded so raw and bloddy, Dean couldn't bare to hear it.   

"Danyael, well this is a surprise. It’s so lovely to have you drop by like this." A drawling voice sneered as Dean approached the door. Despite his hesitation to use the demon blade Dean grabbed the hilt ready to defend himself from an attack. He had promised Sam that he would return to Heaven and he planned on doing just that “It has been quite some time hasn’t it?” The drawling voice added as the owner stepped out of an alcove. Bile burned Dean’s stomach and he took the cold face of Zachariah the chief torturer in Hell. He was once an angel until he betrayed half of Heaven and had his grace removed. Dean had not been surprised when he heard Zachariah had taken up the knives in Hell and began cutting.

"I haven’t gone by that name for a long time." Dean snapped as his grip around the blade in his hand tightened. Zachariah looked down at the blade and for a moment Dean saw fear flash through his eyes.

"Now, now Danyael I would very much like to know where you got that little trinket. We’ve been missing one of those for quite some time and would very much like it back." Zachariah said trying to sound casual but Dean could feel the fear radiating from Zachariah’s skin. 

"A guy can pick up a few things on his travels." Dean said twirling the blade in his hand.

“Oh I know all about your travels, we all do. I see you have those hulking wings of yours strapped back on. Those things really took a beating didn’t they? I’m amazed you can still use them.” Zachariah said smiling sickly. Dean knew Zachariah was only saying this to anger him but the thing was that it was working. His pulse was quickening and Dean wanted nothing more than to slice Zachariah’s head clean off.

“We’re not going to take a trip down memory lane. I’m here on business.” Dean snapped. “Stand down and release Castiel Novak before I run this blade through the spot where your mangled heart should be." Dean snarled. 

“A deal is a deal Danyael and Castiel made his; his brother’s life in return for his relocation into our delightful little neighbourhood. I think he rather likes it here as well”

“I’m not going to play your games, you dick.” Dean hissed. 

“Well aren’t you a bore. I must say though, you do seem to be rather alone if your business is to rescue Castiel Novak. What’s the matter, does no one upstairs want to play with little old Danyael?” Zachariah asked mockingly. 

Grabbing Zachariah by the neck Dean braced himself, knife in hand and ready to cut deep into Zachariah’s skin. “I’m not going to play games and I’m not going to listen to your shitty attempts to get under my skin. Release Castiel Novak now.”

“Now now Danyael-”

Dean sliced along Zachariah's shoulder ignoring the agonised screams coming from Zachariah's mouth. "I said _release him_." Dean snarled. 

"Danyael-" Zachariah tied to say before Dean sliced again, blood beginning to pour from Zachariah's shoulder. "Remember when you were not too similar from us?" Zachariah coughed out wheezing slightly from blood loss. With a snarl Dean gripped on more tightly to the blade and sunk it into Zachariah's shoulder.

"I was _never_ like you, no matter what I did." Dean growled pulling the blade out of Zachariah's shoulder slowly. He took a hold of Zachariah’s neck, digging his fingers into the skin and muscle, lifting him from the ground. Two large hooks, crusted with stale and dried blood, lay close by. Without any mercy, because Zachariah deserved none, Dean drove the two hooks into Zachariah and strung him up, all the while ignoring the tormented cries of agony. “Everything I did was done because I believed it was the right thing. Because I had no other choice.” Dean marched away from Zachariah, still ignoring the pained noises coming from the creature because he could never be described as anything like a man.  

"Not going to kill me then?" Zachariah wheezed as his teeth gritted with pain. 

"No because someone else deserves the chance to kill you more than I do." Dean said pocketing his blade and turning towards the door that led back to Castiel. 

"It's no good; no matter what you do we will eventually win. You think we don’t know what’s going on up there? I may have been shunted out but I know more than you realise. Your system is broken, there is no order up there and the man you call ‘Father’…well he’s long since gone. Heaven is going to crumble into the Earth and every angel will know what it is like to walk hundreds of miles without grace, The Host or a place to call home.” Zachariah laughed between gasps of pain.

"I look forward to the day that someone rams a blade through your throat." Dean hissed unfurling his wings as he blasted down the door. 

“You can’t win Danyael! You’re nothing but a _monster_! You wear those wings but they don’t belong to you and you know it! They are as mangled as your soul, your grace and that pathetic broken vessel you wear!” Zachariah called. It took all of Dean’s will power to not turn back and ram a blade into the hollow chest where Zachariah’s heart used to be. The only reason he carried on was the burning, pulling sensation in his bones that told him he’d found Castiel Novak.

The man was lying on the floor, his eyes closed and breathing laboured. Endless cuts and bruises, scars and burns littered his skin which was stretched over bone and muscle, any fat that had been on his body had been stolen during his time in Hell. Dean's grace was practically screaming as he draw closer to the man, everything inside of him knew that saving this man was the right thing to do despite what Raphael and the other angels believed. Reaching out to grip onto the man’s arm Dean knew that the consequences would be dammed. Castiel Novak was saved. Now the hard part began. 

-

_The Michigan Wilderness_

The burning sensation in his lungs from breathing in the fresh air caused Castiel to gasp out loudly. His fingers scrabbled around in the dry earth, the minuscule pebbles clinging to the raindrops on his skin. Raindrops littering his exposed skin causing goose bumps to flourish across his arms. The minuscule coarse pebbles were similar to those found near water. The air was cold but fresh and it filled his lungs with a weight he’d long since forgotten.

Castiel eyes finally adjusted to the vast expanse around him. Tall moss covered trees surround him while a few large rocks were scattered nearby. The clear air and lack or sulphuric smell told Castiel there was no way this was Hell. He closed his eyes again and tried the desperately think of how he could have gotten here. This couldn’t be one of Zachariah’s games because it felt too feel, the light rain and the feel of rocks underneath him felt too real to be created just to torment him with the taste of freedom.

Castiel had barely closed his eyes before a name burnt through his entire body forcing him to rip his eyes open. _Danyael._ Who that was he did not know, but whoever the name belonged to had to have something with where Castiel was; they had to have something to do with how Castiel had become free from Hell. He was not sure how he would manage it but Castiel was determined to find out who it was and track them down. He had to know how and why he’d been freed and at what cost.

 The grave was simple. Two fallen branches tied together with twine to create a cross. The only way Castiel could tell that it was his own grave was the clawed away earth and the words scratched onto a piece of bark nailed to the cross:

_C.E.N_

When Castiel noticed the familiar curve of the ‘C” and the slanted ‘E’ it felt as if icy water was running through his body and bile rose up his throat. It was Samandriel’s handwriting; he would know it from anywhere after spending years reading over Samandriel’s notes or essays for school. His youngest brother, the one he protected from this life for so long, had been there when he was buried. Castiel gripped the earth, his ragged fingers scrambling around in the dirt, and desperately tried not to heave. His youngest brother was nineteen, nineteen and barely an adult and yet he had been there to witness his eldest brother, with a body mangled by the hounds of Hell, be lowered into a hole in the ground. Seeing the words scratched into the wood, seeing that they had been scratched there by Samandriel’s own hand, made Castiel sick to his stomach. For some reason he was alive, maybe that had something to do with the name Danyael, and he had to find his family before it was too late.

He had to get moving.

Castiel walked through forests and eventually along roads for nearly three hours before he came to a roadside diner, the parking lot filled with trucks and various large vehicles. It looked like the kind of place Castiel and Gabriel would have stopped off at while on the road, occasionally joined by Anna before she gave up hunting, to get food or to rest.

“What can I get you?” the, slightly disgruntled looking, waitress asked as soon as Castiel reached the main counter.

“Could you possibly tell me which state I’m in?” Castiel asked.

“Dressed and looking like that? I’d say a pretty awful one.” The waitress shot back looking down at Castiel torn jeans and worn t-shirt. When she saw the less than impressed look on Castiel’s face she rolled her eyes. “You’re in Michigan, near Monroe to be precise. Look are you going to order anything or just stand here talking about geography? Because there are other customers here and I have a job to do.” She added. “So can I help you?”

“Yes, is there a payphone near here?”

“Yeah, there’s one outside. Your cell phone get shitty reception?” The waitress said nodding over to the door leading out into the parking lot.

“Yes, something like that.” Castiel said before thanking the waitress and heading outside into the weak sun. The payphone stood next to a sign proclaiming that the diner sold the best pancakes and waffles in the state.

Castiel clung to the payphone, his breathing heavy with anticipation as his lungs still clung for air. Finally, after several moments, he dialled the number, reversing the charges beforehand and waited. The phone rang several times before it was answered and as Castiel heard the familiar voice his heart nearly gave out.

Anna’s voice was clipped when she finally spoke “Hello? Who is this?” she asked.

“Anna?” Castiel gasped as his voice cracked. He heard a sharp inhale of breath on the other end of the phone. "Anna is that you?" He asked. It felt like an eternity since he had heard her voice. 

“ _Who_ is this?” The venom in Anna’s actually scared Castiel. Sure he’d heard Anna snap plenty of times in the best but her voice had never sounded that fierce, especially when talking to him.

“Anna it’s-”

“If this is a joke then I hope God curses you.” Anna hissed venomously.  

“Anna it’s me…you have to believe-” Castiel tried to say before the line went dead. Her reaction didn’t surprise him but it still hurt. Anna had been trained just like Castiel and his brothers. Castiel, along with his brothers, had been trained by James Novak from a young age to never trust anyone or anything, no matter what they thought because it could always end up being used against you. Castiel tried to ring Anna again, on both her cell phone and her home phone, reversing the charges each time, but Anna refused each call. Next was Samandriel’s phone which rang out until it went to voice mail thus breaking the main rule Castiel had instilled upon his youngest brother; always answer your phone. He tried Gabriel’s cell phone but it had been disconnected and that sent a wave of panic through his body. Gabriel could be anywhere but at least he knew that Samandriel would be at school in Boston while Anna was at her home in Essex, Illinois, which wasn’t far away from their childhood city of Pontiac.

They’d grown up with Anna Milton; her parents had been hunters with like Castiel’s and she had joined them on numerous hunts when she and Castiel were in their early twenties. After her own father’s death and her mother had quit the hunting lifestyle, Anna had moved back to Illinois permanently and mainly focused on the research side of hunting. Anna’s house was probably the safest place for either of his brothers, after all she was pretty much family.

He had been pulled from a grave, his own grave. He had pulled himself out of that grave that had been dug for him. The thought that Gabriel, or even Samandriel, had dug that grave made Castiel physically hurt. The thought that they had dug through six feet of earth to bury him made Castiel’s stomach convulse. It had been bad enough three years prior when they had lost their father, causing Samandriel to quit hunting altogether and focus on his education. He had moved to Illinois to stay with Anna and studied hard before being accepted at Harvard Medical School. Castiel and Gabriel had never been prouder of their brother when he’d gotten the acceptance letter though it had made them all miss the presence of their father.

James Novak’s death had been hard on them all but back then Gabriel and Samandriel had Castiel there, they had their elder brother there to promise them no one would hurt them like their father had been hurt but this time Castiel wouldn’t have been there to comfort them, he wouldn’t have been there alive. He had to get back to his family as quickly as possible.

Castiel hurried back into the diner and back to the seat he’d been in before. The waitress was still stood behind the counter and still wore a tired expression like before. “Monroe, Michigan…that’s about a five hours drive away from Essex, Illinois isn’t it?” Castiel asked wondering how long it would take to walk there.

“I have no idea; I slept through Geography most days. Can I get you anything though?”

“How much is a cup of coffee?” Castiel asked even though he had no money on him.

“Small mug is a dollar fifty with one free refill.” The waitress said grabbing a half empty pot and filling up a mug before placing it in front of Castiel. The tired look was replaced by that of sympathy. “Class this as your free refill. You look like you could really do with it.” She added. Castiel gave the waitress a thankful smile as she slunk off to deal with other orders. As Castiel looked down at the brown, almost black, liquid in front of him he couldn’t stop the onslaught of emotions and thoughts which were steadily coming to him.

Flashes of Hell came to Castiel and he desperately tried to shake them off. He did not want to contaminate anyone around him with what had gone on down in The Pit. These people hadn’t been suffocated by the horrifying smell of Hell; they hadn’t gone through the torture of hearing people’s screams. They hadn’t been broken, bloody and raw, every single day for forty years until they forgot the person they were and had ever been.

_Danyael_

That name again…it came to his mind as quickly as it went away and Castiel shook on his stool, almost knocking over the mug in his grasp. A sensation, almost blinding and indescribable, ripped through his body. Where the name had come from he did not know but the rush of heat that coursed told him that it meant something. It had to mean something.  

“Excuse me?” a woman asked tapping Castiel on the arm. He looked up to see a tired looking woman. Her dark hair was pulled away from her face with an elastic band and it seemed as though her mind was elsewhere. “Sorry but I couldn’t help but overhear you just.” She said, her cheeks pinking.

“It’s quite alright.” Castiel said with a shrug. 

“Well I understand that you’re hoping to get to Essex right?” the woman asked. Castiel nodded. “My mother doesn’t live too far from there; I can drive you there if you want.” The woman offered. “You look like you’re really desperate to get home.”

“Yes.” Castiel said with a sigh. “Yes you could say that I am.”

“I get that, it feels like I’ve been driving for days instead of just a few hour.” The woman said. “Like I said, my mother doesn’t live too far away from Essex so I can drive you there. It really wouldn’t be much trouble for me at all.”

“Thank you but I don’t have any money for gas or anything like that and I wouldn’t want to impose on you.” Castiel said quickly. The woman’s brow creased in concern as she listened to Castiel.

“Honestly it’s fine. I need to drive through Essex anyway and you said you were desperate to get home. And…well you know, good deeds and all. Maybe this will make up for all the music I’ve downloaded illegally over the years and I’ll end up going to Heaven.” The woman said with a chuckle. Castiel could feel himself flinch but the woman seemed too attentive towards her coffee to notice. “I’m Daphne by the way.” The woman said looking over at Castiel again.

“Oh...I’m Castiel.” Castiel said reaching out to shake her hand because that seemed like the polite thing to do.

“That’s an interesting name.” Daphne remarked taking Castiel’s hand. “It’s much better than Daphne anyway.” She added flippantly. “Do you want to finish your coffee then get going?” Castiel nodded and drained his mug. Daphne finished her own drink and placed her money down next to her mug. While Daphne preoccupied herself with putting on her coat to protect herself from the cold weather Castiel caught the eye for the waitress. Despite her surliness she had shown him a small act of kindness and for that Castiel was grateful. He knew it wasn’t a lot but he hoped that the thankful smile he gave her was enough.

Daphne’s mother, it turned out, had recently had surgery on her hip which was why Daphne was driving to Illinois. Over the next five hours Castiel learnt that Daphne was driving there to spend time with her mother and help her recover. She didn’t fly there because she didn’t like to fly and couldn’t afford the plane ticket. Castiel found himself happily listening to everything Daphne was saying and she seemed not to mind that Castiel didn’t speak that often.  

It was nearing the evening by the time they made it to Essex and a nervous weight settled in Castiel’s stomach as they neared the street where Anna’s house was situated. It was a modest house she had been able to afford thanks to the saving her parents left her after they died. The house was one constant in Castiel’s life, acting like a base for him and Gabriel between hunts and Samandriel had lived there when he was finishing up his high school education.

“Is this the house?” Daphne asked stopping outside of Anna’s house.

“Yes, this is it.” Castiel said trying to fight the nervous roll of his stomach.

“I never did ask you, is this house yours?” Daphne asked. “I’m sorry if I monopolised the conversation.”

“I enjoyed listening to your stories so please don’t apologise. This is my friend Anna’s house.” Castiel said looking up at the house. Anna’s car, the same car she’d driven since she was twenty, sat in the driveway indicating that she was home. Castiel’s car, the car that was now probably Gabriel’s wasn’t there but that didn’t mean anything. It could have meant that the car was in the garage. Castiel really didn’t care because after so long he was going to see Anna again. He was going to see his family again. “I want to thank you for driving me here. You didn’t have to but you did and for that I am very thankful”

“You were in need. I had to help someone in need.” Daphne said giving Castiel a smile.

“Please give me your mother’s address so I can send you some money to thank you.”

“Castiel I don’t want your money.” Daphne said quickly.

“Please Daphne. You’ve sent me home to my family so I want to help you in any way I can.” Castiel said. Daphne sighed but reached behind her to pull a handbag onto her lap. She pulled out a small notebook and pen to write down her mother’s address. 

“Here.” She said handing over the paper with the address written down. “You really don’t have to this Castiel.”

“I know but I want to.” Castiel said. “I hope that your mother is well again as soon as possible.”

“Thank you Castiel.” Daphne said giving him one last smile before Castiel slid out the car. Whatever fate fell upon Daphne he hoped that it was a fate deserving a truly selfless and humble woman.  _Whoever is listening, please look over this woman and her mother. Please give her a fair and just life._ Castiel prayed as he watched Daphne drive away. He hoped that someone was listening and he truly hoped that they blessed Daphne as she really did deserve it.

With a stomach full of lead Castiel turned away from the road and looked up at Anna’s house yet again. He was so close to seeing his family and that pushed him into walking up the pathway to knock on the front door. The water hit him square in the face as soon as the door opened. Anna had only just started reciting the demon banishing chant when Castiel held up his hands stopping her.

“Anna stop it. I’m not a demon, it’s _me_.” He said firmly. "Anna it's me."

“That’s not possible. We… _I_ buried you!” Anna said. “You were…Castiel you were covered in blood! Your body was torn to pieces! _How_?” Anna asked shaking her head at the impossibility of Castiel being alive. “How is it possible? How?”

“Anna…I don’t know…I really don’t know.” Castiel said. "I was...I can't explain it."

"Castiel, none of this makes sense. I buried you."

"I know, I crawled out the grave."

"But I saw you. Castiel I saw you. I can't...I can't." Anna gabbled. A muffled crash came from inside the house closely followed by someone running down the staircase at full speed. Anna was pushed aside as Castiel came face to face with his youngest brother.

“Castiel…you’re…Castiel you’re _alive_.” Samandriel said throwing himself at Castiel and clinging onto him tightly. In that moment Samdriel wasn’t the nineteen year old man who had hunted demons and fought numerous supernatural creatures before leaving for college, instead he was the six year old younger brother who had clung to Castiel during thunderstorms. “Castiel you’re _alive_.” Samandriel mumbled into Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel hugged him back just as tightly. It had been so long since he’d just held someone and felt nothing but unconditional love. His youngest brother pulled away, his eyes swimming in tears, and just stared at Castiel with a look full of awe. “I…I can’t believe it.” He said.

“How Castiel? How?” Anna simply asked. Anna’s earlier words dawned on Castiel and he couldn’t stop his brow from furrowing.  

 “Anna.” He said warily “You said _you_ buried me…where’s…where was Gabe?” Castiel asked. Anna’s face paled at Castiel’s question and she glanced at Samandriel apprehensively.

“You haven’t seen him? Does he know…does he even _know_ that you’re…”

“Alive? Not rotting in Hell?” Castiel offered.

“Well _yes_.” Anna said. “I haven’t seen or heard from Gabriel in months.” She added after a brief pause. Castiel’s blood ran cold at her words.

“Samandriel?” he shot questioningly at his brother. Samandriel ducked his head making it clear he hadn’t seen from Gabriel either.

“I haven’t seen him in a while.” Samandriel admitted with shame.   

“You just left him alone? He watched me _die_ , he watched me be torn apart by hell hounds. How could you just leave him alone?” Castiel asked. The main thing their father had taught them growing up was that they needed to watch over one another. The notion that Samandriel had left Gabriel alone after what had happened was not a notion he wanted to think about at all. “How could either of you just leave him?”

“We didn’t leave him. _He_ left _us_ Castiel. He was there until I buried you then he took off.” Anna said with wide, beseeching eyes.

“Castiel I promise you that I would _never_ have left him.” Samandriel added sounding desperate. “I wanted him to stay with me, give up the life like I did, but he just ran…he just ran. I pleaded with him to stay.”

“You don’t know where he is?” Castiel asked with concern. The thought of Gabriel being out there by himself doing God only knew what terrified Castiel more than anything he’d experienced in Hell. Apart from the few months they’d been apart, Gabriel had gone around Europe after high school much to their father’s annoyance; Gabriel had always been at Castiel’s side. Knowing he was out there alone not even speaking to Samandriel or Anna and still thinking that Castiel was in the pits of Hell sent Castiel into a wave of panic. “Do either of you know where he is?” Castiel pressed.

“Oh I know where he is, I’ve spent enough years researching for you all and watching you to know your patterns. While your father was teaching you to shoot a gun by the time you were eight years old mine was always teaching me about patterns. He was always teaching me how to be able to find anyone or anything. I’ve been following Gabriel, from afar, since he left. He’s here in Illinois at the moment; he’s in the south hunting some witch that killed a ton of high school seniors.” Anna explained.

Samandriel jumped in, clearly terrified that Castiel was angry “I promise you that neither of us left him Castiel…he…he wasn’t Gabriel after you died…he changed so much and I think he couldn’t be around us. I never told him that it was his fault for your death but he thought as much. I promise you that I _never_ said it was his fault.”

“It _wasn’t_ his fault Samandriel…”

“I know, I know Castiel.” Samandriel said ducking his head. The room fell silent for several moments before Anna looked back towards Castiel with a confused look.

“ _How_?” Anna asked. Castiel knew what she meant, how could he possibly be standing in front of her, how could he possibly be alive?

“I…I don’t know Anna.” Castiel said shaking his head. The name Danyael flashed through his mind once again but that was all there was; a name with no face. “I don’t have any memory of leaving The Pit…I saw a light and that…there was nothing but light.” He tried to explain but he couldn’t. “We need to find Gabriel. I tried ringing him-”

“He ditched his cell phone after we buried you but he’s been using disposable phones since then. He…he rang me a few days ago. He hung up as soon as I answered but I traced the call and it was in the same town as the witch reports. I rang a few people and they spotted him there so I’m guessing it was him who rang.”

“Do you still have the number for that phone?”

“He’s probably ditched it; he knows I will have tried to track him down.” Anna said.

“Maybe, maybe not. I can try to ring him; if he doesn’t answer then I’m going to drive down to find him. He can’t carry on thinking I’m dead.” Castiel said. “What the number?” he then asked. Anna went to her desk, which was covered in research, her sleek laptop and several coffee mugs. After rummaging for a few minutes Anna came back with a small piece of paper with a number written down in her elegant handwriting. “Thank you Anna.” He said taking the paper from her hands. After a moment Anna handed over her phone. Castiel gave her a gratified smile and dialled the number. The phone rang for a few moments before he heard Gabriel’s voice.

“Hello?” a rasped voice said answering the phone. Castiel stomach dropped at the sound of Gabriel’s voice. It sounded like his brother had not slept in weeks.

“Gabriel?” Castiel asked gripping onto the phone. “Gabriel is that you?” The other end went silent. “Gabriel please…is that you?” Castiel asked desperate to fully hear his brother’s voice again.

“No…no it’s…please just leave me alone.” Gabriel groaned before hanging up the phone. Castiel heart sank as the dial tone started up and he turned to face Anna.

“That went better than I thought.” Samandriel said shrugging his shoulder nonchalantly. Castiel had to stare at him for a moment with a raised eyebrow.

“He hung up.” Castiel pointed out with a frown.

“It could have gone _a lot_ worse than that Castiel. You didn’t hear his voice after you died. He called me in the middle of the night and I could barely understand him. He was a wreck and sounded nothing like the Gabriel who used to put worms in my shoes when I was six. I called him three days after we buried you and he threw the phone at the wall. He switched to disposable phones after that. You’re lucky he didn’t scream at you.” Samandriel said. Castiel threw the phone onto Anna’s couch and rubbed at the bridge of his nose. He could feel a headache forming and all he wanted to do was sleep but he couldn’t. He had to find Gabriel.

“I know what you’re thinking Castiel.” Anna said placing a hand on Castiel’s shoulder. “You want to go and find him as soon as you can but you need to rest. You’re no use to anyone half asleep and we have no idea whereabouts in Illinois Gabriel is or if here’s still even in the state. You need to sleep.” Anna said squeezing his shoulder affectionately. Castiel wanted to disagree, he wasn’t even sure if he possibly sleep but he knew Anna was right. He was no use to anyone half asleep.  

-

_An Angel Walks Into A Bar_

A barren dry desert in Nevada, a frozen expanse in Alaska, an impossibly tall forest devoid of another living thing in Oregon and a rocky expanse in Washington. Dean didn't stop travelling for several hours, moving from place to place until the pain in his chest subsided. He finally felt as though there was no one following him as he found himself in a small town in the middle of South Dakota. 

There was very little in the town apart from a general store, a few run-down looking antique stores, a coffee shop and a bar. Dean walked into the bar, avoiding the stares from locals and ordered a beer. The alcohol would do nothing to him, he'd have to drink at least the weekly limit of six fully grown men before he'd start to feel something, but sitting in a bar without a drink would seem suspicious.

He looked around the bar, seeing not the faces of the patrons but seeing their souls. Some were dull, barely eve visible while others flickered like candle flame. None of them burnt as bright as Castiel Novak's soul. None of them burnt like white hot flames in the darkest night, spreading warmth to all those it touched.

Once he lost the angels that had been trying to follow him, Castiel Novak would need to be found.

The bar seemed like any other, full of patrons and alive with music. It wasn’t until Dean noticed how one woman sat at the bar did he begin to feel uncomfortable. Her long blonde hair was pulled back from her clear pale face and she wore a calm expression despite her surroundings. The woman, girl really, barely looked old enough to be in a bar to begin with so it wasn’t a surprise that she’d attracted the attention of several patrons in the bar. It wasn’t just her age that seemed to unnerve people. Her posture was perfect and no drink sat in front of her. As she looked over at Dean he felt a flash of familiarity that sent a shiver down his spine. While her light grey eyes narrowed Dean knew he recognised her. She was a lower level than he was but still one of Raphael’s warriors just like Adriel. He reached for the angel blade in his belt as the woman slid effortlessly off her stool and walked over, her posture never changing as she walked.   

"Well Danyael you seem very at home here in a place like this. I would say you look almost human." The woman, girl even, said sitting down across from Dean.

“I’m sure that was a meant as an insult Zophiel.” Dean muttered taking a swig of his beer. "Speaking of humans, that’s not the most conspicuous of vessels if you wanted to walk in and out this bar without anyone noticing you. How did you persuade her to say yes?"

"This?" Zophiel asked looking down at the vessel's slim teenage body. "A devout Christian cheerleader, would you believe it? She asked for something more awe inspiring than being on top of the cheer pyramid and here we are." Zophiel said shrugging her shoulders. "Personally I think she suits me, it's easier to get humans to do things when your vessel looks like they fell out one of those awfully cheesy catalogues where the socks alone cost $20." Zophiel shot Dean a knowing look.

"Vessels aren't chosen for their looks Zophiel."

"Says the angel whose vessel won the genetics lottery." Zophiel said looking Dean up and down with a cold look.

"Stop objectifying my vessel and tell me why the hell you are here." Dean snapped. 

“We are on the same side of this war Danyael. We are fighting alongside one another. There is no need for rudeness.” Zophiel said cocking an eyebrow. Dean could see several patrons still looking towards the blonde woman. He needed this meeting to be over.  

“What do you want?” Dean asked never letting his grip lighten from his blade.

"Raphael wants to speak to you, now." The angel said snippily. “It is not open for discussion either.”

"Zophiel, if he wants to talk then he can get down here and talk to me without sending you."

"Nonsense Danyael. You need to see him and I would leave now before he brings down all of Heaven to drag you back there. Leaping from state to state won’t help you this time. He wants to talk to you now." Zophiel said stiffly narrowing her eyes. "He knows that you got you little pets to help you as well so the sooner you get home the easier it will be on everyone."

"Are you threatening my brothers?" Dean hissed shifting in his seat so he could easily strike Zophiel if needed. She was as much a warrior as Dean but he had the advantage of height and experience.

"Come with me and I won't have to." Zophiel said sliding out the booth and marching across the bar. Dean drained the bottle of his beer and followed her outside. He could have easily attacked her with his blade if were not for the other three angels waiting outside.

“So you brought the halo cheer squad to pep me into going?” Dean asked cocking an eyebrow. From the sour look on Zophiel’s face there was a strong chance she was contemplating punching Dean in the face.

“Very funny. Did you really think I would try to get the angel Danyael to do anything without bringing backup? This is body maybe that of a silly little co-ed but I am not a simpering little idiot Danyael.” Zophiel said with a smile that was almost sneering. “Now, Raphael would like to speak with you and he does not like being kept waiting. Let us be going.” Zophiel added striding over to Dean and pressing two fingers against his forehead.

Dean wasn’t even given a chance to protest before he found himself in a large and ornately decorated room. Zophiel and her fellow angels were nowhere to be seen and before moment Dean thought that he was alone until he saw the figure standing at the end of the room.

“Raphael-”

“Silence.”

“You can’t command me you know; you’re not my leader and certainly not my keeper.” Dean shot back not even caring at how furious Raphael looked.

“Your ‘leader’ has not been seen in years and you are in no position to talk to me in this way.” Raphael said. “What were you thinking? You knowingly endangered yourself by storming The Pit and killing countless demons in the quest to save _one man_!” Raphael said. His voice did not rise at all but that was even more daunting. Dean could handle screaming, he welcomed it sometimes, but Raphael’s calmness unnerved him more than anything. “Tell me what you thought you would gain from it?”

“I don’t need your approval over this Raphael; I saved Castiel Novak instead of just waiting around like everyone else in this damn place.” Dean shot back instantly regretting once Raphael’s eyes narrowed. The archangel could kill him with one snap of his fingers, both of them knew that, but Dean still stood his ground despite Raphael’s palpable anger.  

“You continue to forget your place here; you continuously forget who you are or what you have done.” Raphael said. Dean looked away, unable to carry on looking into Raphael’s eyes. A burning sense of shame grew in the pit of his stomach at Raphael’s words. “You will find Castiel, no matter what and deal with him. You might have several members of Heaven convinced that you belong up here _Danyael_ but I know differently and it is time that others saw that as well. Samuel made a mistake by returning you to us and the sooner he realises that the better.”

 Dean’s eyes narrowed as he looked back at Raphael. “Raphael-” he tried to say warningly but Raphael held up a hand to stop him.

“No, I will call you whatever I damn well please because I want you to remember your place, I want you to remember who you are.” Raphael said venomously. “Now, you find this Castiel and make sure that, for once, you follow orders and do the right thing. I can guarantee that beings will be looking for him, half of them being the creatures of Hell so you better hurry.”

“And the other half?”

“The others are the garrisons who would rather see him dead than walking around on the Earth.” Dean flinched at Raphael’s words. “He spent forty years in Hell Danyael. Something like that changes a person and especially a skilled and experienced hunter. We cannot, and will not, have someone who has been mutilated by Hell on Earth.” Raphael said. “Now get out of here, find Castiel and deal with accordingly.”

“Deal with him?” Dean asked raising an eyebrow. “Raphael we’re not executioners, we’re supposed to protect the humans; that is our job. My job was to watch over them and protect them.”

“Our job is to do God’s word and carry out his orders. Something you failed to do on several counts in the past.” Raphael reminded him almost cruelly

“So God ordered the death of an innocent man believed to be the Righteous One?” Dean asked sceptically.

“Castiel Novak has been mutilated by the hands of demons, his presence on Earth will bring danger and it is our duty to protect the Earth that God created. It is as simple as that Danyael. Castiel must be dealt with accordingly and you are the one who must do that.”

“Because I’m so damn important?” Dean asked scoffing.

“No, because you were the one who went through all that trouble to pull him out of Hell in the first place. You can finish the job you started.”

“You’re a sick bastard.” Dean snapped. Raphael’s eyes narrowed once more but this time Dean did not flinch, he stood tall and glared right back because he knew deep down that he was the one on the right, the murder of Castiel Novak could not be God’s word at all even if God had not been seen or heard from in a long time.

“You may believe that Danyael but I am also the only archangel with any power here.”

“No, you’re the only one twisted enough to try and take over Heaven.”

“Less I remind you that Lucifer is in his cage where he belongs, Michael wandered off many a year ago now and the pathetic weakling you call your brother is running almost empty. I can rip your grace from that throat of yours before you had the smallest chance to react. I could do the same thing to your pathetic little garrison as well and I will if you do not go through with this.”

“So that’s your defence, threats of violence?”

“Danyael you will do this or I will not hesitate to kill everyone you hold dear. I will track down that pathetic little turncoat you called Jo and rip out her grace before killing her. I will revel in killing both Adam and Samuel before I hunt down Michael and burn him. These are not threats Danyael, these are promises.” Raphael hissed. “Now get out of my sight before I make you really pay for what you have done.” He spat turning away from Dean and dismissing him with a wave of his hand.  

-

_The Bitter Truth_

Samandriel knocked on the door and called out for Castiel. Castiel's murmuring reply seemed to be enough for him as he opened the door and stepped inside the room.  His hand was closed into a fist, as if he were holding onto something and from the way his eyes flitted around the room Castiel could tell he was scared Castiel would yell at him.

"I am not going to shout at you." Castiel assured his youngest brother.

"I know...I wanted to give you this." Samandriel said opening his hand and holding it out to Castiel. In Samandriel's palm sat an old silver pendant on a leather cord. It had hung around Castiel's neck since he was a young, the pendant belonging to their mother and their grandfather before. “I…I took it from your neck before we buried you…I guess we all just wanted to keep a part of you after you died.”

“Thank you for giving it back to me.” Castiel said tying the leather cord around his neck. “I have to ask why you’re here at Anna’s. Shouldn’t you be at school right now?” Castiel said and Samandriel’s face reddened as he turned away from his elder brother. “Samandriel?” he pressed when Samandriel continued to not look at him. “Samandriel why are you here and not at school?”

“It doesn’t matter at the moment.” Samandriel mumbled.

“Yes it does, tell me Samandriel.” Castiel pressed.

“I quit.” Samandriel said after a few moments of silence.

“You did _what_?” Castiel said, his mouth hanging open in shock. 

“I quit school…after you died I quit and moved back here. Anna let me move in with her and we were going to suggest having Gabe live here as well but he took off.” Samandriel said.

“You just quit school? After everything it took to get you there you just quit?” Castiel asked. “I cannot believe that you would do that.”

“You _died_ Castiel. First of all Gabe died and no one told me, you sold your soul to bring him back and no one told me and then you _died_ and Gabe called me distraught. So yes, yes I quit school when Gabriel finally told me that my eldest brother had made a deal with Hell and been dragged there.”

“We sent you to school to get you away from this life! We all used our savings paying for you to study becoming a doctor so you wouldn’t become a hunter like Gabe, Anna or I. We did all of that and you just _quit_?” Castiel’s voice began to rise until Anna came hurrying into the room, a look of worry on her face.

“What is going on?” she asked looking between Castiel and Samandriel.

“He _quit_ school Anna.” Castiel snapped. "He just quit school like it was no big deal."

“I _know_ he quit…I tried to get him to go back but he didn’t want to." Anna snapped back. 

“How could you just let him quit and come back here?”

“I didn’t have much of a choice Castiel!" Anna yelled, her face growing red with anger. "Gabe went missing and you were _dead_ , the safest place for Samandriel to be was here with me.”

“No Anna, the safest place for him to be was at school.” Castiel said. 

“So you would rather have me in Boston than here in Illinois?” Samandriel snapped glaring over at Castiel.

“I just want you to be safe.” Castiel said.

“And I’m safe here.”

“No, you’re safe as far away from the hunting life as possible!” Castiel yelled turning on his heels and storming past Anna.

“Where are you going?”

“To get some air…to think…I don’t know.” Castiel said walking out the room and downstairs. He knew he just had to get out the house before he ended up saying something he would regret.

He’d grown up protecting those around him, several of those were no longer with him, and feeling as though he had failed was tearing Castiel apart. He had already lost so many he loved along with his parents and Gabriel and he knew he could not lose Samandriel. Sending his youngest brother off to school had been like the safest thing to do, he wouldn’t be hunted down by demons, vampires or any other supernatural creature. He could grow up having a normal life not having to go to bed at night worrying about salted window and door frames or devil’s traps. Samandriel had been so close but because of Castiel he’d given up his biggest chance of a normal. Castile couldn’t help but let the guilt eat away at him. 

Castiel walked back inside after nearly an hour of sitting outside. The cool air had calmed him down and steadied his breathing until he felt like he could be back inside Anna’s house. He didn’t say anything to Anna or Samandriel, instead choosing to walk back upstairs to the room he’d be sleeping in in order to get changed out of his clothes. He was looking through the small collection of his clothes that Anna kept for whenever he stayed there when Samandriel knocked on the door meekly.

“Anna wants to us to leave at five in the morning tomorrow, I convinced her to make it seven instead though because you need your sleep.” Samandriel said. “She says the longer Gabriel doesn’t know you’re alive the worse he’ll take it when he finds out so we’re going to try and find him as quickly as possible.”

“We can make it five; I don’t need that much sleep.” Castiel said.

“Castiel don’t be stupid.” his brother sighed sighed. “You need to rest.”

“I’ll be fine; the main thing we have to worry about right now is Gabriel. Anna is right, the longer he goes on thinking I’m still in Hell the worse it’s going to be when he finds out I’m alive.” Castiel said pulling an old t-shirt over his head. If he went to sleep now he’d get a good few hours before they hit the road to find Gabriel. “Samandriel please.” He said pleadingly. “I don’t want to argue, I just want to find Gabriel and have everything go back to normal.”  

“Ok…try and get some sleep then.” Samandriel said moving to leave the room. 

"Wait" Castiel called out stopping his brother. "I'm sorry for shouting at you about school."

"Cas-"

"No let me finish. I'm sorry that I shouted but you deserve so much more than this life, you deserve more than the constant fear that comes from all of this. That's what I want for you."

"Well what I wanted was for my family not become a broken mess but I guess that things don't always go according to the plan." Samandriel shot back leaving the room before Castiel could say another word.

-

_The Right Thing_

Finding Castiel, at least finding out where he was, took several hours. Normally it would take moments, maybe minutes, but something was blocking him. Something was blocking him from finding the pinpoint location of Castiel Novak and yet Dean couldn’t think of a reason why. There was a possibility Castiel was in a warded area, after all he was a hunter, but as he located several of Castiel’s other family members fairly quickly it must have been something to do with Castiel himself.

Anna Milton’s house was guarded against demons, ghosts and several other creatures but not angels. Dean discovered this when he was able to fly straight into the living room. There was also a possibility that Castiel could be in the house but Dean had to hope. He heard the crossbow fire rather than feel the pain of the arrow lodged into his shoulder. He deftly pulled the arrow out of his flesh, feeling muscle tear as his did so, and examined it as his wound instantly began to heal. Silver arrow tipped with iron. The arrow of a hunter. 

A flash of red hair came from the side as a knife was swiftly held against Dean's throat. Without even thinking Dean twisted the woman's wrist round behind her back and placed two fingers against the woman's pale forehead. She fell to the floor, the demon knife in her hand clattering to the floor. Dean looked down at the ornate blade and smiled for a moment at the thought that the Novaks were experienced enough hunters to not only know of the demon blade but have one in their possession.

A surge of energy that Dean knew was coming from his grace ignited inside of him as he heard heavy boots against hard wooden flooring. A voice called for someone called Samandriel to run, hide and not ask any questions. Dean turned to the sound of the noise as a man ran into the room, gun in hand, and stopped once he saw the woman on the floor. He looked up over to Dean was a furious expression and as Dean’s eyes met the startling blue of the man’s he was taken back to that moment in the Pit when he pulled Castiel from Zachariah’s clutches. Castiel Novak. 

“Castiel.” Dean said as Castiel took aim. “Dude, put the gun down.” He said holding up his hands showing Castiel that he wasn’t armed with any human weapon. Castiel narrowed his eyes for a moment before lowering his gun and looking over to the woman with a frenzied look.

"What have you done to her?" He hissed towards Dean. “And how do you know who I am?” 

"I haven't killed her, killing innocent humans isn't my style at all. She's just asleep so you and I can talk." Dean explained. Castiel laughed harshly and looked at Dean like he was insane.

“Talk? You come in here after nearly knocking the place down, knock out my friend and you want to talk. Who on earth do you think you are?" Castiel asked shaking his head.

"I’m the sorry-ass son of a bitch that defied most of his family to drag you from the Pit and Zachariah's mutilated hands so you better show me some fucking respect." Dean snapped, his temper getting the better of him. If Sam or Adam where there, heck if Jo where there, then they would have kicked his ass for shooting his mouth of like that but he’d gone through enough first pulling Castiel out of Hell then finding him. He had a reason to be pissed.

"You...it was you who pulled me from Hell?” Castiel asked. “You were the one who raised me?”

“Yeah, there probably should be a thank you in there you know.” Dean said but Castiel’s confused expression did not let up, in fact he carried on glaring through his confusion.

“How? What are you, a demon?" Castiel asked and his eyes flitted to the knife Anna Milton had dropped. Dean couldn’t help but snort which caused Castiel to glare even more so. Either the guy was really pissed off or he needed his eyes testing badly. 

"No Castiel I'm not a demon so you can stop shitting bricks but thanks for the compliment" he said sarcastically. "My name is Dean and I'm an angel of God.” Dean decided that he shouldn’t beat around the bush so instead he decided to screw subtly and just come out with the truth.

"Excuse me?” Castiel almost coughed out as he squinted with confusion.

"I'm an angel. You know; wings, celestial powers…we’re sometimes seen a pieces of toast...an angel."

"That's not possible...” Castiel said shaking his head in disbelief.

"After all the things you've seen that go bump in the night you're going to quibble that angels aren't possible?" Dean asked. “We need to get out of here, you’re not safe here.”

“That’s highly unlikely; this house is warded against nearly every supernatural creature known to man.” Castiel said.

“Well it’s not seeing as I strolled right on in here.” Dean said. "Look, I really mean it. We need to get the hell out of here, now."

"I'm not going anywhere until you right my friend and tell me what is going on." Castiel said, his gun was still raised and aimed at Dean’s chest.

"Dude, I told you that I was an angel and for the time being that's all you need to know." Dean said. From the way he stood to his questioning, it was clear that Castiel Novak had been raised by an experienced hunter and was one himself. From Dean’s past dealings with hunters he knew that Castiel probably deserved a lot of respect for the job he did.

"Why exactly should I trust you?" Castiel asked and despite the respect Dean thought he should show, even though Castiel wasn’t showing him any, he snorted loudly.

"Did you not hear that I was the one who rescued you from Hell? Do you think I'd go through all that just to kill you now?" Dean asked. He could see that Castiel was thinking this over. "Seriously, we don't have time."

"Why?"

"Let's just say some people are pissed that you're not rotting in the ground and they'd prefer you go back to your less than alive state.

"I'm used to people wanting me dead.”

"Not these people you ain't." Dean muttered. "I'll wake up Red here while you grab the person I’m guessing is your youngest brother from upstairs because even though his anti-demon sigils are airtight they won't do squat against half of what's after you." Dean said. Castiel finally lowered his gun, clearly he’d decided to trust Dean for the time being. He gave Dean a long hard look before quickly leaving the room and Dean heard him running upstairs. Dean let out a relieved sigh before turning to revive Castiel’s friend.

The red-head put up a very quick fight until Dean pinned her wrists down and gave her a firm look. "Look I stabbed enough demons to get your friend out of Hell so can you quit trying to kill me for five minutes so I can save your life?" He asked as she continued to struggle against his grip.

"Anna." Castiel called as he walked back into the room with a young man who didn't look that much younger than Adam's true vessel. "Listen to him."

"So we're just going to believe him?" Anna said narrowing her eyes at Dean furiously.

"For the time being yes." Castiel said.

"Yeah, especially when I can help you track down your brother." Dean said. Three pairs of eyes were on him then, each ranging in emotions from Anna's relief to the young man’s down right ecstatic. 

"Ok fine, we'll trust you for the minimum amount of time required." Anna snapped marching over to a desk in the corner of the room. A brand new looking laptop sat proudly onto the desk along with several notebooks until Anna placed them in a large duffel bag she pulled from under the desk. "You both packed?" She asked Castiel and the young man. They both nodded. "Right then, let's get out of here." She said firmly barging past Dean.

"Yeah, I'd do as Red says because we're about to have visitors." Dean said as a cold shudder went up his spine. 

“Call me Red one more time and I will stab you.” Anna said narrowing her eyes at Dean. He couldn’t help but snort. A stab wound caused by the knife in Anna’s holster would slow him down for merely nanosecond.

“Samandriel go to Anna’s car now.” Castiel said looking between Anna and Dean. Samandriel looked at his brother with fear filled eyes.

“Castiel-”

“ _Now_ Samandriel!” Castiel shouted as he pulled out his gun. Unless it was filled with rock salt bullets then it was going to be pretty ineffective. The red head and Castiel’s young brother both hurried out the house while Dean braced himself. Castiel’s gaze fell onto Dean’s face and in his Dean could see that while Castiel was scared he was putting faith in Dean, he was putting his life in Dean’s hands. "If anything happens you have to protect them." Castiel said.

"My plan is to protect all of you." Dean said honestly. He knew this was going against all the orders Raphael had given him but he couldn't kill an innocent man. Raphael was not his leader, Raphael was not Him and most importantly Raphael was not right. Dean was going to protect Castiel Novak for as long as humanly possible because it was the right thing to do no matter what happened. 

“Well…isn’t this cosy?" The cold shiver was now an ice pick to Dean's spine. "Danyael, Danyael, Danyael…didn’t they ever teach you that it’s rude to take other people’s things?” a sneering voice said. Dean whirled round as the cold, heartless black eyes of Zachariah came into focus. 


	3. Part Two

**Part Two**

Dean’s initial reaction was to bury his blade deep into Zachariah's chest, making the long since twisted creature feel all the pain and anguish those tortured in Hell were made to face but Instead Dean stood stock still out of sheer amazement that Zachariah was here. Even from where the man was stood Dean could hear Castiel's heart beating frantically against his chest. Horror and rage rolled off his soul in great crashing waves though the man's face was an expressionless mask not giving away the vehement emotions that thrummed under his skin. His soul flickering frantically like a candle’s flame caught in a strong wind and Dean was desperate to fight. After surviving the horrors of Hell the flame could not go out, Dean could not let the flame die.  

He understood the fear thrumming under Castiel’s skin; Zachariah had been the one who tortured the man in Hell for months without relenting. If Dean had been the one whose soul and body was broken repeatedly by that heartless asshole then he would have been shit scared too.

“I’m still very upset by our last meeting Danyael. You stole my chew toy then left me hanging quite literally; it was _very_ rude of you.” Zachariah said in that smarmy voice that Dean had detested back in Heaven but now he hated it even more.

 “Yeah well you clearly found one of your little mutilated lackeys to pull you down and spruce you back up.” Dean snapped. Zachariah let out a derisive sounding bark of laughter as he glanced around Anna’s small house.

“You are hardly one to talk about mutilation. You are hardly one to talk about clothing too for that matter. Frayed denim is scarcely acceptable on humans alone.” Zachariah retorted. The bastard could smirk and sneer all her wanted but Dean never gave a shit that he felt more at home in frayed jeans than neatly pressed suits. “I see you’ve still got a hold on our little friend Castiel, though not as literally as last time.” Zachariah said as his gaze shifted back onto Castiel. Dean felt the man’s soul quiver but it was still strong and as resilient as the man it belonged to.

“This house is warded against demons, this isn’t possible.” Castiel said aiming his gun at Zachariah’s head. Castiel’s reaction despite his fear was impressive; Dean had to give the guy kudos even if his gun would be pretty useless against someone like Zachariah.

“Oh Castiel put that silly little human toy away before you hurt yourself. We spent so much time together down in Hell and it pains me to see that you didn’t learn anything about me.” The smug smile on Zachariah’s face was actually sickening. “Especially after everything I heard you scream in the dark. Did you hear some of those prayers Danyael? They became incredibly pathetic as time went on I must say.” He added with a self-satisfied chuckle. Castiel let out an agitated snarl and for the first time Dean could see the hunter that lay within Castiel. There was rage yes but underneath that he could see a fierce determination that could easily make him a perfect hunter. It was the rage Castiel was emitting now that told Dean the man was seconds away from planting a bullet into Zachariah’s brain. It would do fuck all to Zachariah but Dean wouldn’t have minded watching it happen.

“ _Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus_ -” Castiel began to bark out furiously before Zachariah’s sarcastic laugh cut him off.

“Oh you poor simple little creature, you really know nothing.” Zachariah said. “After all those months of wanting to fight you don’t even know what you’re fighting against. I thought you had more brains than that Castiel, I really did.” Zachariah continued despite Castiel anger. Yeah, Dean was going to give it a few more seconds before there was pseudo-angel brain matter splattered across Red’s tastefully minimalistic wallpaper. 

“I wouldn’t piss him off dude, he’s got more reasons to kill you than I do and I won’t stop him if he wants to do so.” Dean  

“I shouldn’t piss him off? The same thing should be said about me Danyael! You angels think that you can just take my little play thing and expect me to not become perturb?” Zachariah snapped angrily. “I thought you overgrown pigeons were smarter than that but clearly you’re not. I’m going to ask nicely and if you refuse to cooperate then things will get messy and I mean that quite empirically. Hand Castiel back over to me, I will even say please if I must.”

“You can say it until you’re blue in the face but Castiel ain’t going anywhere with you.” Dean shot back without a seconds thought.

“That was your only chance there Danyael. I’m afraid things will have to become messy now. The question is where shall we start though? I could break every bone in Castiel’s body but that might not have the right impact. There is always forcing his lungs to drown in his own blood or I could make every single one of his vital organs shut down until he’s nothing more than a broken mess of a meat sack. Does that sound good to you?” Zachariah asked still smirking away like the bastard he was. Dean didn’t even give Castiel a chance to react before he’d grabbed hold of Zachariah’s neck. His nails dug into Zachariah’s skin.

“He is not gonna go anywhere with you. End of.” Dean snarled as he bore his teeth. “I dragged him out of Hell and away from your disfigured hands so don’t you think for a fucking second that I’m going to let you take him back down there. You can fuck off straight back to Hell empty handed.” His fingers dug into Zachariah’s skin and if he wanted to he could snap the man’s neck without any effort what so ever. He could kill Zachariah and this would all be over but he’d said down in Hell that someone else deserved to kill Zachariah, someone whose body had been broken by Zachariah’s own hand.

“One way or another he will end up back in Hell.” Zachariah hissed so Castiel was unable to hear him, this was only meant for Dean to hear. “I will take him back with me and his body will be broken over and over again, ripped to shreds and sewn back together, and you will hear his screams and prayers for the rest of eternity.” Zachariah threatened. “I will take him back with me or Raphael will kill him. Raphael will kill him and that pain will be even worse than the pain I will put on him. You have no hope here _Danyael_ , no hope at all.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Den snarled and he didn’t care that it wasn’t angelic because all he wanted was for Zachariah to stop talking. He couldn’t hear about he was going to fail because he couldn’t fail when he knew what he was doing was the right thing.

“No matter what you do Castiel Novak will die a horrifying death.” Zachariah warned. He could talk all he wanted but wouldn’t let that happen. Castiel Novak had gone to Hell for his brother and clearly he would do anything for his family and there was no way Dean was going to let him suffer for that.  

“Castiel get outta here.” Dean said quickly. Yes maybe Raphael might try to kill Castiel but it wouldn’t be today and Dean would not let Zachariah hurt Castiel either.

“He tortured me down there!” Castiel shot back defiantly. “I’m not just going to walk away from this.”

“Yeah he tortured you but that’s gonna cloud your judgement man so get outta here now.”  

“Look at you…only known each other for five minutes and already arguing like an old married couple. It’s adorable or deplorable…I haven’t decided yet.” Zachariah said between coughs as Dean’s hold on the man’s neck tightened even more so.

“Castiel you need to get outta here”

“Dean-”

“GET OUT OF HERE CASTIEL!” Dean roared. His voice reverberated against every possible surface, his grace echoing through the words making them louder than could ever be possible for a human. Sharp and defiant blue eyes stared back at him for a moment before he saw a flicker dash through the irises. With a softening look Castiel lowered the gun he had never stopped aiming at Zachariah and backed out the room. Relief flooded Dean’s body for mere seconds before Zachariah chuckled sardonically.

“Still playing dress up and hiding are we Danyael? Castiel probably thinks you’re a loyal little angel, a saviour of mankind almost, but he has no idea does he? He has no idea how far from the truth that is.” Zachariah coughed out. “How do you think he will react when he learns you’re a liar? That you’re nothing but a monster with wings tacked onto his back?”

A sharp metallic taste filled Dean’s mouth. He had chewed into the inside of his cheek to stop Zachariah’s words from sinking in and poisoning his whole body. Blood lay heavy on his tongue and he wanted nothing more than spit it in Zachariah’s face to make the man stop talking but that would not change anything, Zachariah could carry on digging a verbal knife into Dean’s gut because he knew just what to say to make Dean feel actual pain.  

The angel blade Dean prided above any other weapon would kill Zachariah in seconds, the blade would end it all but Dean couldn’t bring himself to taint his blade with Zachariah’s blood. He would rather rip Zachariah apart piece by piece, organ by organ, than stain one of the only things remaining that told him he was still an angel.

“Dean.” A voice said but this one didn’t belong to Zachariah. Dean had been so focused on the blood filling his mouth, so focused on the defaced man slowly suffocating between his fingers, that he had not heard the ripple of grace announcing the arrival of an angel. “Dean stop.” Sam, it was Sam. The voice belonged to one of the only angels Dean could still trust with his life.

“Oh look…talking about tacked on wings…the cavalry is here…” Zachariah coughed out.

“Dean stop and let him go.” Sam said moving to Dean’s side with swift fluidity. “Dean let him go.” Sam pressed as his fingers dug into Dean’s skin as his hand wrapped around Dean’s wrist. “ _Dean_.”

“Li-listen to…your pigeon…Danyael.” Zachariah said between wet sounding coughs. Dean’s grip slackened as he pushed Zachariah away from him. The man crashed to the floor while Dean exhaled loudly as adrenalin pumped through his veins. “He has a loud voice for someone with such silent power.” Zachariah said with a chuckle. It was a testament to Sam’s self-restraint as he didn’t weld his own angel blade and stab Zachariah in the chest.

“I might have just stopped my brother from killing you but I could change that in a second.” Sam warned as the grace around his body fizzled with anger.  

Zachariah looked upwards towards Dean and Sam before smirking. “Another time then Danyael, Samuel it’s always a pleasure.” He said tipping his head before disappearing as quickly as he appeared. As the adrenalin cooled in his body Dean sighed with relief and motioned for Sam to follow him outside. The sooner he was out the room, out the house even, the better. Sam nodded in agreement and the pair walked out of Anna’s house to the driveway.

Castiel was stood in front of a car, a freaking _Prius_ Dean realised after a moment, and by the look on Castiel’s face he was in the middle of a heated debate with Anna. By the sounds of it Anna was refusing to let Castiel drive her car. Heck that wasn’t a bad thing seeing as it was a Prius and the guy hadn’t long since left Hell. The redhead might have shot an arrow at him and tried to kill him but Dean had to admit that she was clearly the sane one here.  

“Is that him?” Sam asked nodding towards where Castiel was stood frowning at Anna. 

“Yeah that’s him.” Dean said. He could have said so much more to describe the hunter he had saved from Hell but by the look Sam gave him those words weren’t needed.

“I’ve tracked down his brother.” Sam said completely stumping Dean in that moment. Whatever he thought Sam was going to say it certainly wasn’t that. 

“You what?” Dean asked furrowing his brow at his closest brother. 

“He went to Hell for his brother and he would want to track him down once he was out of Hell, finding him seemed like the most helpful thing that Adam and I could do.” Sam explained. “We posed as hunters and asked around. Gabriel Novak is in Salem; it’s only a couple of hours away. He’s on a case there according to a few hunters we asked and he should be there until tomorrow night at the least.” He added with a shrug like it was the most logical thing in the world. Honestly, in that moment, Dean could have kissed him because at least Castiel would hear one good bit of news that night. “These are the coordinates for the hotel so you can give them to Castiel.” Sam added handing Dean a small piece of paper.

“Sammy, you and Adam are geniuses.” Dean said.

“Yeah we’ve heard that a fair few times. Where will you go after you've found Castiel’s brother?” 

“The safe house, Zachariah probably remembers half of the old houses so he could find us. The only place he doesn't know about is the cabin.” Dean explained. 

“Ok, Adam and I will be listening out for you and will get to the cabin as soon as we can.” 

“Thanks...and thanks for what you in the house.” Dean said.  

“For stopping you from killing Zachariah?” Sam asked arching an eyebrow.

“Yeah and I called you a genius so that's all you're gonna get but don't let it go to your head.” Dean said pointedly. 

“Next time you can handle all this shit by yourself.” Sam said and Dean was sure he heard him mutter “Ungrateful ass”. Dean gave him a small punch on the arm and began walking towards Castiel and Anna. The debate over whether Castiel should drive or not was still waging and it was painfully clear Castiel was losing said debate. Castiel’s younger brother was sat in the car, his feet rested up on the dashboard with a heavy book in his hands, and he looked about as done with the argument as Dean was. 

“I have been driving a car since I was _seventeen_ years old Anna. I am perfectly capable of driving.” Castiel said furiously.

“You were in Hell for months and you’ve hardly slept since that ‘angel’ pulled you out of there. I’m sorry but there is no way I am letting you near my car.” Anna shot back folding her arms across her chest with a stubborn look on her pale face.

“Well I could drive my own car if you hadn’t let Gabriel-”

“ _Excuse me_?” Anna snapped glaring furiously up at Castiel. Ok the chick was pretty scary when she glared even when she wasn’t holding a weapon. “Do you really think that I could make Gabriel do _anything_? He hasn’t done what we asked of him since he was two years old!”

“You could have _tried_ to stop him!” Castiel retorted. 

“How? By nailing his feet to the floor?” Anna yelled back, her voice going up several octave the more she shouted.

“If that was the only thing that would work then yes!” Castiel snapped back.

“I understand you were in Hell but you need to stop being such an ass over this and just accept that I made a mistake over letting Gabriel leave but I am sorry about it! It’s not like I wanted him to leave, I wanted to stay with me and Samandriel but when Gabriel wants to do something he’s going to do something!” Anna snapped poking Castiel in the chest. “It’s just like when he decided he was going to take down that werewolf when he was fifteen.”

“He dislocated his shoulder and cracked three ribs trying to take down that werewolf!” Castiel shouted.

“And sprained an ankle.” The youngest brother Samandriel said sticking his head out the window. Both Anna and Castiel turned to glare at him so he held up his hands in defeat and returned to reading the book he’d placed in his lap.

“How long do you think they can carry on shouting at one another?” Sam asked with a look that clearly indicated he was rather enjoying watching the argument.

“Ok, ok! I hate to break up this family discussion but my brother Sam here has found out where your brother Gabriel is.” Dean said before shots were fired or punches thrown. Castiel turned away from Anna and Samandriel to give both Dean and Sam a relieved look.

“You've really found him?” He asked. Sam nodded his head in reply. “Thank you.” Castiel breathed out sounding beyond relieved.

“I’ve tracked him down and he’s only a few hours away. You should be able to see him soon.” Sam said smiling at Castiel’s reaction.

“So we’re just going to trust another random angel?” Anna asked looking between Dean, Castiel and Sam. Before Dean said something that would probably end up in him being punched by the red head Castiel rolled his eyes heavily.

“Yes we’re going to trust both of them because one of them saved my life and the other found Gabriel which, at the moment, is more than I say for you.” Castiel snapped at Anna who looked back at him with shock. Yeah it was kind of a dick thing to say and it really didn’t help the awkward atmosphere but maybe it was one of those things that needed saying.  

“Yeah so…” Dean said trying, and failing, to defuse the situation. I guess you guys will want to pack up and get the hell out of here right now.” Zachariah could easily come back or, if luck really wasn't on their side, Raphael could send some of his lackeys down. Anna gave Dean a less than pleasant look before turning on her heels and getting into the driver’s side of the car.

“What did you do to her?” Sam asked.

“I might have done the whole 'tap on the forehead' and 'knock her out' trick so I could talk to Castiel.” Dean said shrugging his shoulders.

“She's gonna shoot you in the head before all this is over.” Sam said giving Anna an approving glance.

“Having known her since she was little, I have to agree with your brother here.” Castiel said. Dean groaned and prayed that if Anna did shoot then it wouldn't be anywhere important like his heart or crotch. Sam, the traitor, gave Castiel an approving smirk which Dean would get back him for later. Sam looked between Castiel and Dean with a shrug then disappeared with a ripple of grace through the air. The look made Dean glanced over to Castiel and he realised the man had shot Sam a friendly but dismissive look. Dean’s eyebrow cocked questioningly. “Why didn’t you let me kill Zachariah back then? Why did you want me to leave?” Castiel asked.

He was a good person, a good and caring person. He had to be if he’d gone through all the pain in Hell to save the life of his brother. Dean had met countless hunters during his time on Earth, to do that job you had to have a sense of right and wrong but Castiel was different in the sense that he was a genuinely good person end of. Dean had heard enough of the guy’s prayers and pleas to know that he was a good person. A much better per- he was better than Dean was.

“You don’t need that on your conscience.” Dean said shrugging.

“I have been hunting since I was a teenager Dean. I have killed countless demons, wendigos, rugarus, vampires and every other creature you can think of. I watched my brother bleed out in front of me and die. I saw _Hell_. Killing the thing that tortured me for months on end would not have messed up my conscience.” Castiel shot back. “You should have let me kill him.”

“You should worry about finding your brother not killing Zachariah, believe me the guy is relentless so you’re gonna get another chance to kill the asshole and next time I won’t stop you.” Dean said. “Dude, worry about the ass kicking your brother is going to give you then after that you can plan how you’re gonna kill Zachariah. When that time comes I promise you that I won’t try to stop you. You went to Hell to save your brother but you didn’t belong there, remember that.” Yes it was dangerously close to a motivational speech, the kind Sam or even Michael used to give him and he’d mock them for it, but Dean felt like Castiel needed it in that moment.   

-

_Questions in the Environment-Mobile_

He wasn't wholly sure on how it happened but Castiel ended up in the back of Anna's pokey car sat next to the angel, and that was going to take some getting used to saying, who called himself Dean. The other angel, who said his name was Sam, had disappeared and Castiel didn’t feel like it was right to question Dean on where the other angel had actually gone.

In fact there were nearly a million questions running through Castiel's brain as he stole small glances over to the man, or whatever he was, next to him. There was a strong possibility that at least ten of those questions would ignite the angel's anger so he stayed silent instead until Dean shot him a questioning look. Maybe he hadn’t been as subtle as he first thought.

“You knew jack all about angels before today so how did you stay hidden for all those hours?” Dean asked him.

“Excuse me? You found me didn't you?” Castiel asked completely perplexed by Dean’s question.

“No…not exactly. I assumed from all your prayers that you’d find our family first and your younger brother was at Red’s house so-”

“Excuse me but I do have a name.” Anna snapped from the driver’s seat.

“So that's where I went after sorting a few things out first.” Dean said narrowing his eyes at the back of Anna’s head. Clearly Dean didn’t appreciate interruption. “Normally we can find someone in seconds but with you it was different.”

“Wait…you couldn't find me?” Castiel asked with a frown.

“I could until several hours ago. It was like a block was up.” Dean explained. From his seat in the front of the car Samandriel spun round with intrigue, nearly dropping the book he’d been absorbed in for the first part of the drive. Castiel could practically hear the gears in his youngest brother’s head whirring. His brother had always been a keen student and living with while he completed high school had been the best for him. He had been surrounded by all of Anna’s books and had spent the hours when he wasn’t doing school work on devouring endless amounts of knowledge on the supernatural.

“Um...excuse me.” Samandriel said giving Dean a cautious but courteous look. “When the block went up, was it in the late evening?” He asked Dean. Dean nodded his head in reply. “It could be the pendent Castiel wears.” Samandriel said nodding towards Castiel’s neck. “I’ve had it since…well it was in Anna’s house for the past few months and I gave it back to Castiel when he arrived at Anna’s. It was late in the evening and it’s a long shot but maybe that’s the reason you weren’t able to find Castiel.”

“Could I see it? The pendent?” Dean asked also nodding at Castiel’s neck. The heavy silver pendent felt like it was burning into his skin under the scrutiny coming from Dean’s gaze. Apart from those months in Hell the pendent hadn’t left Castiel’s neck since his mother had given it to him. It had been his link to her and now an angel, a creature he hadn’t even realised existed until half an hour previous, was requesting to scrutinise it. With reluctance he removed the leather cord from around his neck and placed that pendent into Dean’s outstretched hand. The angel rolled it over in hand and stared down at the silver pendent. “Where did you get this?” Dean asked.

“It was my mother’s. It was her father’s before that and she gave it to me when I was younger.” Castiel explained.

“None of us could translate it but it isn’t in any of the languages any of us know.” Samandriel said from his seat. From the excited look on his face Castiel could tell that his brother was almost salivating over the possibility of finding out the translation of Castiel’s pendent.

“That’s because it’s written in Enochian. It’s the language of angels.” Dean said handing the pendent back to Castiel. “The inscription is a warding spell; it shields the wearer from being found by any angelic being which I guess is why I wasn’t able to find you. You’re lucky to have it.” Dean said as Castiel looked down at the pendent. It had always meant a lot to him, any gift from his mother had meant a lot to him, but now the knowledge that it protected him made the pendent even more important to him than before. How his grandfather had come in possession of an Enochian charm was a mystery that Castiel knew might never be solved but that didn’t matter because at least there was a possibility he would be safe.    

After the conversation about Castiel’s pendent the following hours spent driving towards the motel were in near silence apart from several of Dean’s ‘helpful’ comments in regards to Anna’s driving skills or her lack of taste in music. Castiel watched as Anna’s face slowly went nearly as red as her hair and it wasn’t until she threatened to kick Dean out the car that the comments stopped almost all together.

They hadn’t long since entered Salem when Anna slammed on the brakes of her car so suddenly that Samandriel’s head nearly smashed into the glove compartment in front of him. Dean swore loudly as they came to a skidding halt.

“What the hell Red?” Dean snapped rubbing his neck as if he were in pain. “I know this is a shitty car but even a monkey could drive it.”

“Will you shut up and stop mad mouthing my car? It got us here so leave your comments to yourself.” Anna snapped at Dean. “It’s your car Castiel.” Anna said by way of explanation as she nodded over to a motel parking lot. Sure enough there was the dark grey Buick that Castiel had driven since he was seventeen years old. Gabriel must have taken it the night Castiel died because there was no other way it could have ended up in a crappy motel parking lot. “Gabriel’s here alright, he might be a flighty bastard but he’d never leave your car.” Anna said as she gunned down on the car accelerator and swung into the parking lot. Once again Dean swore when his head bashed against the window.

“She has a point; he knows that a lot of pain would come his way if anything happened to that car.” Samandriel intoned.

“Good, you can’t wreck a 1966 Buick Rivera Boattail without getting an ass kicking.” Dean said rubbing the side of his head where it had hit the glass from Anna’s sudden braking of the car. “If you’ve made me bruise Red then I’m gonna be pissed.” Both Castiel and Samandriel turned to stare at Dean in surprise. “What? I’m like a million years old; I know one or twenty things about cars and that car is a beaut.” Dean added by way of explanation much to Castiel’s surprise.

“Great we get lumped with the patron saint of American muscle cars, just what I always wanted.” Anna muttered parking her car near the motel entrance. Once the car was stationary Anna turned to Samandriel with a fixed stare. “Come on, you’re going in there with me.”

“To do what Anna? Gabriel isn’t going to be the most reasonable person right now.”

“Exactly. We’ll talk to Gabriel first without Castiel. If Gabriel sees him before we get a chance to explain all of this then there’s a strong possibility he’ll end up getting shot with rock salt bullets or be drowned in holy water.” Anna explained reaching over Samandriel’s lap to open the glove compartment. She pulled out a stack of fake licences, credit cards and various authority badges. She leafed through several of her own and threw them into her bag with ease.

“How come I never got a fake ID?” Samandriel asked sounding thoroughly put out by the notion. Anna fixed him with the same hard look Castiel gave him. She might not have been related to them by blood but Anna was still thought of as family and that meant inheriting the piercing glare that Castiel had perfected from the age of four.

“I worry about your intelligence if you have to ask that question.” Castiel said while Anna flipped through the remaining cards and licences. Once she’d finished fishing out those belonging to Castiel she held them out to him so he could choose one.

“James Milton or Clarence-”

“James.” Castiel said hurriedly before Anna could finish her question. She shot him an apologetic look as she handed over several cards all with the name James E. Milton.

“We’ll head in then one of us will call you once Gabriel has stopped yelling, throwing things or attempting to shoot one of us.” Anna said once again nudging Samandriel. “Come on.”

“Oh yes, I’m so excited to be shot at by my elder brother.” Samandriel mumbled sarcastically.

“He won’t shoot you. He once made you cry by hitting you over the head with a teddy bear. You were four years old and he was swiftly sent to translate Ancient Greek text books after apologising to you. Believe me, he won’t shoot you.” Anna shot back and to this day Castiel could still remember the look of sheer horror on his six year old brother’s face when their father made him do those translations. “You’ll be ok by yourself?” Anna asked spinning back to look at Castiel.

“I am sat right here in the car, he’s not gonna be on his own.” Dean retorted. Anna fixed him with the hard look she’d also given Samandriel. Most men would have cowered in fear just from the look alone but Dean stood his ground and Castiel’s respect for him rose dramatically. “Nothing is going to happen to him Red, I busted my ass enough to drag him out of Hell so I not just gonna let him go back there.”

“Will you be ok?” Anna asked Castiel blatantly ignoring Dean’s remark. From the small pout on Dean’s face it was clear he was not used to being ignored by anyone. Castiel had to resist smiling at the thought of an angel pouting because it really didn’t go with the image he had held for so long of what an angel was meant to look like.

“I’ll be fine Anna, just worry about Gabriel’s reaction to all of this.” Castiel said. Anna nodded and slid out the car, Samandriel hot on her heels. The two of them walked towards the motel as silence in the car. Honestly Castiel was at a loss at what to say. What did you say to someone who claimed to not only be an angel but who also claimed to be the one who dragged you from Hell? How was Castiel to know it was even true? He had no memory of being freed. All he remembered was-

“Danyael.” He whispered as the name came flooding back to him. It had been there like fog in his brain for days but now it crashed against his skull like a fierce wave. Zachariah had called Dean by that name, Castiel was only remembering that now, so the name had to mean something.

“What?” Dean breathed out heavily as he whipped his head around to stare at Castiel, hysteria darkening his green eyes. “What did you say?” he asked with a demanding tone to his voice.

Dean knew of that name, it was plain to see, and Castiel was desperate to know who the owner of the name was. “Who is Danyael?” Castiel asked intrigued by Dean’s reaction. The way his darkened green eyes bore into Castiel’s face with that mix of confusion and fear made Castiel feel uneasy but he wanted answers. In his line of work the answer was vital even if disquiet was present.

“How do you know that name?” Dean commanded almost frantically. Yes, he definitely knew who Castiel was talking about.

“I’d like an answer to my question first.” Castiel shot back instantly. Dean’s face reddened as Castiel pressed on. “Dean I need to know who this Danyael is. Please.” Adding the ‘Please’ into the end might stop Dean from looking so furious or it would at least make him more likely to tell Castiel the truth.

Dean took a deep breath. “It’s…” Another breath though this one was more harried than the last. “ _I’m_ Danyael. It’s my…it _was_ my name for a long time but it’s not anymore.” Castiel’s breath stilled at Dean’s words. Of all the responses Dean could have given him, Castiel was not expecting that one. He’d been prepared for so many responses hearing that the name he’d been hearing belonged to the man in front of him was perplexing.

“Oh.” Castiel said because he realised he hadn’t said anything since his breath had stilled. “You lied to me then, about your name.” Truth was a concept that Castiel held highly and if someone lied to him then he found it hard to trust that person for a long time. His life was now in this angel’s hands so a lack of trust would jeopardise that. 

“No. I didn’t lie to you.” Dean, whoever he was, almost snapped angrily. “I haven’t gone by my other name in a long time Castiel. My name is Dean but it used to be Danyael. Simple as that.” There was clearly more to Dean’s, Danyael’s, story but from the guarded look on Dean’s face Castiel could tell that now was not the time to be asking any more questions. “How do you know that name?” Dean asked calmer now. It seemed that Dean was not above asking Castiel questions on the matter though. “I answered your question so you could at least answer mine.”

“When I woke up it was the name I heard.” Castiel said cagily though he hoped the Dean did not pick up on that. The full truth wouldn’t make sense.

“You heard it? How?” Dean pressed with a furrowed brow.

“I don’t know but that was the name I heard. It makes sense though, it being the name you used to go by seeing as you saved me.” Castiel said even though his stomach felt as if it was burning with a churning nervous sensation. Dean’s fixed glare was the source of that nervous churning and it made him worry if it had been a mistake bringing up the name of Danyael. “I shouldn’t have asked about it should I?”

“No you had a right to ask about it. So the fake ID cards…” Dean said and it was fairly likely that he was trying to change the conversation. “What’s that about?”

“This lifestyle isn’t exactly legal most of the time and none of us can afford a criminal record. Plus the federal badges mean we can access crime scenes that citizens aren’t privy to, that helps with cases.” Castiel explained. “The credit cards help to back up the various identities.”

“I doubt you guys make money of this though.”

“My mother…she came from money and when she died it all went to my father, Gabriel, Samandriel and I.” Castiel said. “We didn’t have to worry about money that much growing up and it helped a lot.”

“And James Milton was…”

“James was my father’s first name and Milton is Anna’s last name.” Castiel replied. “Both Gabriel and I have various pseudonyms we go by, as did Anna before she gave up hunting to focus primarily on research. Samandriel doesn’t have any because we’ve tried to keep him away from this lifestyle; he deserves a chance to live a normal life.”   

“And sitting in Red’s environment-mobile is the life you pictured for him?”

“Not exactly. He was at school but…well he’s taking time out at the moment but as soon as this is all sorted out he’s going back.”

“You make it sound like he hasn’t got a say in situation.” Dean said with a snort. 

“He hasn’t.” Castiel said firmly because there was no way he was going to let Samandriel throw away his education.  

“Speaking of your brother, he’s been in there for a while. Are you sure that Gabriel wouldn’t have shot him or that moody friend of yours?” Dean asked.

“My brother watched me die and now he’s hearing that I’m not actually dead, it’s going to take some time to get him to stop shouting. Gabriel might like to joke about things but he was raised as a hunter, he can be very serious about things. This is going to take some time.” Castiel said. 

“Fine but if he’s gone mental and shot your brother and Red then I’m not bringing them back to life.” Dean said shrugging his shoulders. Could Dean actually do that? Could he really bring people back to life? There was a niggling feeling in his stomach that made Castiel want to question what Dean had just said but he had already asked enough questions so instead he settled himself in his seat and waited in silence for Anna to call. 

Castiel’s phone blared loudly interrupting the silence that had fallen through the car. Anna’s name popped up on the screen as the car filled with the sound of his ringtone. Castiel swiftly unlocked the phone and pressed the phone to his ear.

“You need to get in here _now_.” Anna said sounding beyond desperate. He hadn’t heard her sound so distressed in a long time. “Gabriel isn’t taking this well at all and he’s all set to get back in your car and drive as far away from us as possible. You have to get in here.” Anna said hurriedly before hanging up. Castiel barely even glanced at Dean before a finger was tapped against his forehead and he found himself standing in a crappy motel. He heard someone swear loudly and that voice filled him with happiness because the voice belonged to his brother.

“Gabriel?” He asked turning to look at his younger brother. The past few months had taken its toll on Gabriel. Dark bags hung under his eyes and it looked as though he’d lost weight. Castiel’s death was the cause of this and Castiel hated himself for it because he’d caused his brother to look like that, he’d caused the sleepless nights and weight loss and now he would have to do everything in his power to make it up to Gabriel.

“This isn’t possible.” Gabriel said shaking his head wildly.

“Believe me I said the exact same thing.” Anna said from where she was stood.

“How do you even know that it’s him? He could be a ghost or a demon or _anything_!” Gabriel said pointing at Castiel with a look of sheer horror.

“Excuse me?” Anna cried with an affronted look. “You don’t think that I did _everything_ I knew how to do. My house is warded against every creature we know of and I didn’t even give him a chance to speak before I threw holy water in his face. It is him Gabriel, it _is_ Castiel!”

“It could be him, ok it’s probably him, but who the hell is the Abercrombie model who just poofed in here?” Gabriel said waving his arms in Dean’s general direction. Dean looked highly offended by that comment. 

“That would be the angel who knocked me out.” Anna said snippily.

“You knocked out my friend?” Gabriel asked turning on Dean with a furious look. Ok Gabriel was an amazing hunter, and Castiel had only met Dean a few hours previous, but in a fight between Gabriel and Dean then Castiel's money would be on the angel who pulled him out of Hell. 

“I sort of also saved your brother but I’m guessing _Anna_ didn’t bother to mention that.” Dean snapped. 

“Wait, you’re telling me that _angels_ are real. Those fluffy fat things in diapers who play the harp are real?” Gabriel asked. 

“Do I look like a fat naked diaper wearing harp player to you?” Dean replied with an arched eyebrow. From the look on Gabriel’s face he was itching to say something uncouth or overtly acerbic but Castiel shook his head. There was a time and a place for his brother lack of tact or penchant but now was not it.

“But he dragged you from Hell? That’s how you’re back?” Gabriel asked Castiel casting a wary look over at Dean. Castiel nodded because that was easier than trying to understand how an angel had rescued him from Hell. “You’re really back? This is really you?”

“Yes Gabriel it’s really me. I promise you that this is me and that I won’t go anywhere.”

“Yeah well you better fucking well not because I was pissed the last time it happened.” Gabriel said with a faux-casual shrug as he pulled Castiel into his arms for a firm hug. This had been one of the only things Castiel had thought about when in Hell. He had dreamed of the day when he could just hug Gabriel again and tell his brother how much he meant to Castiel and now, thanks to Dean, he’d been given that chance.   

“Look I get that this is a heart-warming family moment and shit like that but we’re in a motel room with hardly any protection-”

“I’ve warded this room-”

“Yeah you’ve warded it against demons but you’ve done fuck all to ward against angels or Zachariah so we need to get out of here and go somewhere safe.” Dean said not even letting Gabriel finish. Castiel watched with actual amusement as his brother stood looking as if he’d swallowed something foul.

“And exactly where are you suggesting?” Gabriel asked folding his arms across his chest and clearly attempting to look menacing despite the height difference between him and Dean.

“There’s a place I can take you to but we’re gonna have to go now. Oh and where we’re going doesn’t have the best parking facilities so the cars are gonna have to stay here.”

“Excuse me? You want me to just leave my car in some shitty motel parking lot and head of clear across the country without even knowing where we are going?” Anna intoned angrily.

“It's a _Prius_ , I'm doing you a favour.” Dean shot back. What Sam had said back at Anna's house was probably true; Castiel could easily see her shooting Dean in head before too long.

“If any harm comes to that car then you are going to buy me a new one.” Anna snapped pointing a finger at Dean's chest menacingly. 

“Fine and I'll manage to get you one that won't have you mocked by everyone on the planet.” Dean said giving Anna a huge smirk. Yes, Castiel would be surprised if Anna hadn't shot Dean by the end of this conversation alone. “Everyone done bitching about cars and shit like that? Good ‘cause we need to move our asses.” Dean asked surveying the room. Gabriel and the others shrugged their shoulders which was probably an answer even if it wasn’t the one Dean was looking for going by his expression. 

"So where is it that we're going?" Castiel asked while Gabriel set about packing away his things. Samandriel and Anna went to Anna's car to get their bags so that pretty much left him alone in the room with Dean. He assumed that Dean would be more likely to talk to him when his while family wasn't stood around judging everything Dean said or did. 

"It's best if you don't know. Zachariah is a prick, bluntly put, and he won't stop. If he finds out you know where the safe house is then he won't just come after you, I'll come after your family and you've done enough to protect them." Dean said glancing towards the bathroom wherein Gabriel was throwing toiletries into a bag. "I know this will piss you off but you can't know."

"I understand. Anna and Gabriel might not so make sure you're not around them when they have knives in their hands so just watch out." 

"So basically half your family hates me?"

"It's really a third because Anna's technically not family but arguments sake let's say you're right there." Castiel said unable to stop smiling when Dean let out an exasperated sounding laugh. "Maybe knocking Anna out wasn't the greatest idea you had."

"What about knocking your brother out?" Dean asked. "The annoying one that is, not the nerdy one."  
  
"I'd prefer it if you didn't knock out any other of my family members but if Gabriel is that infuriating then go ahead." Yes he loved his brother but even he had to admit that Gabriel was a pain in the ass most of the time. Speaking of Gabriel, Castiel watched as his brother stomped out the bathroom and threw a full duffel bag onto the nearby bed. He had stripped the room of everything supernatural and all his personal items though he didn’t look too happy about it.

“What if this case isn’t finished? What if there’s something I missed?” Gabriel asked furiously.

“Gabriel you’ve been hunting with me since you could fire a gun, there is nothing that you missed.” Castiel said trying to placate Gabriel. “You’ve solved the damn case so grab the damn duffel bag and move your damn ass because I spent months being tortured by Zachariah and I do not want you to ever go through even a fraction of what I went through. Now _move_.” Castiel said firmly because even if he was trying to placate Gabriel he needed his brother to actually do as he was told for once in his life. Gabriel stood with his mouth gaping like a fish for several moments before he grabbed his duffel bag and stomped out the motel, no doubt to find Samandriel and Anna. “I’m surprised that actually worked.” Castiel said more to himself than anyone.

“Well you can celebrate your small victory once we’re outta here and a lot safer.” Dean said pointing to the motel door so Castiel could follow Gabriel’s suit, minus the stomping of course.  

 -

_Safety Through The Storm_

The safe house Dean spoke about turned out to be a large cabin in one of the various mountain regions in America. The exact location was still a mystery as Dean had transported then using angelic powers and refused to tell anyone where in America they were.   

“What is this place?” Castiel asked taking in the cabin. The path leading up to it seems almost inaccessible by car, one would have to go on foot, and from the lack of sound it seems like this is the only cabin for miles. The cabin was surrounded by trees though in the distance Castiel could see a mountain range though he didn’t recognise it. He assumed by the lack of familiarity they were somewhere in the Pacific Northwest; he was more familiar with the Midwest and Southern states than anywhere else in the States.  

“Some angels have safe houses all over the globe if they're ever needed and this is one of my own. No one outside my garrison knows about this place so you'll be safe here.” Dean said motioning for the others to follow him. There was no lock on the front door and Castiel practically hear the sarcastic Gabriel had forming until Dean muttered a word in a language none of them understood. As the door swung open Samandriel gave Castiel a questioning look but he simply shrugged his shoulders as it wasn't one if the languages he knew.

“It's Enochian.” Dean supplied for all those confused. “The door won't open to anyone without the password.” 

“Are keys too boring and human for you Deano?” Gabriel asked with a smirk. 

“It's _Dean_ and locks can easily be picked.” Dean shot back with a sharp look. Gabriel went to say something, no doubt dripping in ridicule, but Dean pointed a finger threateningly at him. “If you don't shut up I won't give you the password and you can the one to find out what happens to those who don't know it.” Dean added warningly. That shut Gabriel up instantly. “Anyone else have any comments they wanna get out the way? No? Then move your asses and get in the house.” Dean said commandingly.

No one else said anything else, instead they all followed suit and walked into the cabin. Castiel hadn't felt such warmth from a house in many years. He'd grown used to small and sparse motel rooms which were used as rooms to get a few hours’ sleep in more than anything else. The whole cabin was made from deep honey coloured wood and smooth deep grey stone. The exterior of the house was nothing compared to how large in inside of the cabin was or how the large windows caught every fragment of light possible. 

“We shouldn't have to worry about being safe.” Gabriel muttered darkly as he looked around the cabin. Castiel shot his brother a firm look that made it very clear he should stop talking. The last thing he needed right now was Gabriel’s attitude.  

“Gabriel just be quiet.” Castiel shot back. Gabriel, for once in his life actually stopped talking much to Castiel’s amazement.

Castiel didn’t realise how large the cabin was until Dean showed each of them where they would be sleeping. Samandriel and Gabriel were in the first two rooms on the second floor, both of them overlooking the front of the property and larger than the rooms they’d had back home or at Anna’s house in Essex. Anna’s room was down the hall and was full of books. Dean might have been trying to placate her seeing as he’d knocked her out but from the small appreciative look on her face it worked.

“I thought that you could do with some space from everyone.” Dean said when it was just him and Castiel in the hallway. They came to a second staircase that Castiel hadn’t noticed originally, which just by looking at it he assumed lead to an attic, but as he followed Dean up the stairs he realised it lead to a large open plan room with windows that overlooked both the front of the property and the back. From the back window he could see the vast expanse of forest and the mountain region in the distance. “This was my room when I spent more time here and I thought you’d appreciate the space and the quiet.” Dean said sounding awkward but Castiel still valued the gesture.

“I appreciate the space. Thank you.” Castiel said taking in the room. A record player with a large box of vinyl records sat in the corner along with a small bookcase packed full of books, many of which Castiel recognised from Anna’s house. The room felt like it had been lived in for a long time, it felt like a home.

“I get it ok? You’ve got so many questions and they’re going unanswered and you’re probably shit scared but I get it.” Dean said. “Your family is probably pissed that I’ve dragged you all away from your homes and put you in danger and I’m sorry, and I sorry that you’re gonna have to stay here for a while, but this will keep you safe.”

“I understand that. You saved me, I don’t know why you saved me but you did and for that I am eternally grateful.”

“Yeah…I’ll let you get settled in and all that jazz. Just…just call if you need anything.” 

“Dean” Castiel called as the angel began to move towards the staircase. The angel stopped and looked back over his shoulder. “Yes I have questions, I have a lot of questions and I have a lot of doubts. Everything is telling me not to trust you because I do not know you and I didn't even know that angel really existed until you appeared in Anna's house but I trust you. You saved my life and you're keeping my family safe so I trust you.” Castiel said trying to keep his voice steady. 

“You trust me?” Dean asked warily. 

“You make it sound like I shouldn't trust you.” Castiel said. “I probably shouldn't. I said that everything is telling me not to trust you but I do.”

“I...thanks Cas.” 

“Cas?”

“Your family could rival my family for long-ass names.” Dean said with a shrug. “But yeah...thanks.” Dean added with a brief smile on his face. Castiel was surprised by how young the smile made him look. Dean had said he was eons old but on that moment he looked the same age as Castiel, he looked like an equal. Before Castiel could say anything else Dean gave him a curt nod of his head and vacated the room. 

Once truly alone Castiel could take in the space. The room, like the rest of the cabin, was full of beautiful natural light streaming in from the high windows. Incredible craftsmanship must have gone into building the cabin and Castiel respected that as he took in the high ceilings and warm walls. He understood why Dean had selected this as a safe house, it felt like a home.  

-

_How Much More Can You Lose?_

A whole freaking week passed and Dean heard nothing from either Sam or Adam. This was the longest they’d gone without contact for many years and it did nothing to settle the knot of nervous tension in his gut. He tried to act as normal as possible so it wouldn’t freak out Castiel or his family but he assumed they could tell something was wrong seeing as they all seemed to walk around on eggshells. True they acted like most humans; they ate the breakfasts Dean cooked every morning, Anna and Samandriel gravitated towards the bookcases in the library and Gabriel took it upon himself to try and annoy Dean to an early grave but it still felt stilted.

He found it impossible to concentrate on anything the longer the silence from Sam and Adam went on. Yes it was just a week that week of silence caused an anxious itch to worm its way underneath Dean’s skin. The silence was too much like last time, too much like the silence that came after Jo and Michael left. He longed to hear from them, to know that they were safe but they’d made their choices to leave and in the end he had to respect that. He couldn’t sit around waiting to hear from them but it wasn’t like he could go up to Heaven to find them. For starters he couldn’t leave Castiel unguarded because given if no one else knew where the safe house was luck had never really been on Dean’s side. Secondly if he took one step in Heaven then Raphael would be kicking his ass in seconds. He couldn’t just up and leave; he’d be putting too many people in danger.

Days continued like this until they had been in the cabin for two weeks. Two silent weeks. Castiel and his family would wake, eat and fill their days with reading books while Dean would lock himself away in the small study at the back of the cabin. The room had been Michael’s, it had been the place he went to so he could think, plan or strategized, and it felt strange to be sitting in the chair Michael had sat in for so long. Dean wasn’t sure why he filled his days by sitting there but it was oddly comforting even if it didn’t feel completely right.

This cabin had been home for a long time, even when Heaven had been a home the cabin had been the place where he belonged. So many plans had been made within the cabin’s walls and so much history had seeped into the wood. The place was a home and for now it would keep them safe, at least Dean hoped it would keep them safe because he couldn’t lose anyone else. He just couldn’t.

It was nearing ten o’clock at night. The smell of the dinner Anna had cooked still lingered in the air. Castiel and his family were probably sat somewhere in the cabin either reading or slowly going insane over not being able to leave. Dean couldn’t really blame them; he was slowly going stir crazy from not hearing anything from Sam or Adam and if it went on any longer-

“Dean! Dean!” Castiel yelled from the main room. The panic in his voice sent shards of terror down Dean’s spine as he hurtled himself out the study and sprinted into the main room. He didn’t know what he expected, demons or Zachariah himself but both his brothers with frayed clothing clutching their angel blades was not one of the things he expected to see.

“Sam? Sammy?” Dean called noticing the blood on Sam’s blade and the limp in his brother’s leg. “What the fuck happened?” he asked looking between Sam and Adam. Adam looked bruised but he wasn’t bleeding which was a freaking miracle in Dean’s eyes.

“Raphael called us to fight. Apparently there was a group of traitors in Heaven and he called us to fight.” Adam spat out venomously. Dean sensed the venom wasn’t directed at any of them but at Raphael instead.   

“Zaphkiel and Haniel are dead.” Sam said sinking into the nearest chair. Dean looked to Adam for confirmation and once he saw the defeated look on his youngest garrison member's face grief swelled up in his gut. Like his brother Dean sank into a nearby chair and groaned loudly into his hands. 

“Are you sure?” He asked from between his hands.

“Yeah...we’re sure. Camael killed them with his own hands. We saw it happen.” Adam said. Dean looked up and saw Sam's face had turned almost ghostly pale. “According to Raphael they were the main traitors and he ordered Camael to kill them.”

“Camael has joined Raphael? I thought he had gone quiet.” Dean said. The last he’d heard of the angel was that he had turned his back on the fighting in Heaven and wanted nothing to do with it. Clearly times had changed.

“Well he's joined the fight and now Zaphkiel and Haniel are dead.” Adam said with a grimace. Dean swore yet again as the truth sunk in. He had fought alongside Zaphkiel for eons; they had been akin to friends for a time.

“Who...who were Haniel and Zaphkiel?” Castiel asked looking between the three angels in the living room. Without having to be asked Anna set about making hot drinks and from the look Castiel shot him Dean assumed this was something she always did. Clearly according to Anna coffee and tea made the world a better place.

“Both of them were angels, part of The Seven, and they fought alongside us.” Adam said sighing with exhaustion. 

“The Seven? As in the archangels? They were both archangels?” Samandriel asked with interest. Seriously, if the kid was a dog his ears would have pricked up with the potential of acquiring new knowledge.   

“Yeah The Seven are archangels.  They’re the ones who are closest to God. They’re the ones everyone else listens to really. Before Lucifer fell there were seven but after that it became six; Camael, Zaphkiel, Haniel, Raphael, Michael and…” Adam trailed off with a hesitant look in Sam’s direction. Dean could feel the uneasiness following off Sam in waves. 

“You can say it Adam.” Sam said from his seat. He reached out for the steaming mug Anna had just placed in front of him. “Thank you Anna.” He said. He took a sip of the hot liquid before speaking again. “Now that Haniel and Zaphkiel are dead the remaining members of The Seven are Camael, Raphael, Michael and me.” Sam’s voice sounded laboured, as if the truth about Haniel and Zaphkiel was finally sinking in. Maybe tea didn’t make the world a better place. “I might not have any say or power up there anymore but I am still part of The Seven.” He added almost bitterly.

“You’re…you’re a member of The Seven?” Samandriel asked looking at Sam with awe. Sam nodded his head dourly and continued to sip on his tea. “What happened to-”

“Now is really not the time.” Sam said standing up suddenly. “The battle was long and I’m tired, I’ll be upstairs.” He said storming out the room, tea in hand, leaving everyone else blinking in surprise.

“Did…did I say something wrong?” Samandriel asked with a stricken voice.

“No, no you didn’t do anything wrong.” Adam said quickly. “It’s a very long story and I shouldn’t have brought it up. I'm going to rest as well, you guys should probably do the same." he added with a defeated shrug. There was so much Dean could say but the words wouldn't come out, they were fighting a losing battle against the grief rising in his chest.   

Adam left the room and the heavy awkward weight stayed clinging to the air. It wasn’t much of a surprise when everyone, apart from Dean, left a few minutes later. Even with the room empty the grief bogged him down and he found himself unable to rise from his chair. He stayed that way for several hours until the stillness made the anxious itch under his skin flare up again. It was an itch that could only be resolved with the help of alcohol.

Dean raised a full glass of whiskey to his lips and drained it of its contents. In a matter of days everything had begun to crash around him and t felt like he was fighting against a great storm. He’d lost two fellow warriors and Heaven had lost two of their leaders. With Camael now active that left Heaven in the hands of him and Raphael which was not a pleasant thought. Hopefully the whiskey would help drown those thoughts out. As he moved to refill his glass a shadow near the doorframe to the room caught his eye.  

“Don't stand there like a freakin' hat stand Sam. What do you want?” Dean called as his brother came into view. A dark look clouded Sam’s face.

“I get that you’re pissed about Haniel and Zaphkiel but I spoke to Raphael while in Heaven.” He said almost accusingly.

“Awesome.” Dean said acerbically looking down at the glass in his hand. “What did the winged dictator have to say for himself? Was it a rousing sermon in order to rally the troops?” The acid tone of his voice cut through the room and judging by Sam’s disgruntled frown he did not appreciate it.

“This is serious Dean.” Sam said with a snap.

“So just go ahead and tell me Sam.” Dean shot back with just as much anger. Yes he probably was taking his grief out on Sam but he was sick of messages from Raphael, he was sick of the whole damn war.

“You never told me that you were supposed to kill him.” Sam said accusingly. “You were supposed to kill him, not bring him to the only safe place we have on Earth” Sam warned.

“Sam-”

“Raphael is serious about this Dean.” Sam's stern words rang through Dean's body sending revulsion down into the pit of his stomach. “His orders are next to His, you can't just ignore them because he isn't Michael.”

“Don't Sam ok? Just don’t. Raphael's word is not the same as His and it never will be.” Dean snapped refusing to look in the direction of his brother.

“He is giving Raphael His word, Raphael wouldn't order it if it wasn't what He wanted.”

“You think I should just kill Castiel?” Dean asked slamming his glass onto the table. The glass shattered cutting into his hand but he didn't care. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. “You're an archangel Sam! You've had direct messages from out father in the past and do you really think it is something that He would ask of?”

“I never said that Dean so don't put words into my mouth.” Sam snapped back. Deep crimson trickles of blood from the cuts on Dean's hand dropped onto the table but neither he or Sam took notice of it. “What I'm saying is that Raphael won't take this disobedience lightly.”

“I know Sam ok? I know. I'm the one who knows what it's like to face up to actions. I'm the one who lost things.” 

“And I didn't?” Sam snapped. “I lost just as much as you did Dean.”

“No, no you really didn't. You were there and no one was out to kill you. I was alone. I was cut off and completely alone.” The words left Dean’s mouth before he had even realised it. They were bitter words he’d been keeping in for so long and he had been promising to himself that he wouldn’t say those things to Sam but now they were gushing out and he couldn’t stop them.  

“I had to follow orders.” Sam said breathing heavily as if he was holding back his emotions.

“And I was doing what I thought was right but I guess we both fucked up.” Dean said. Now that the flood gate had been opened he couldn’t stop the words from falling out even if they hurt Sam. He knew he’d hate himself for it in the morning but he couldn’t stop.  

“Dean-”

“Sam just stop it because it doesn't compare! You lost things sure but you never lost-” shuffling from the hallway cut Dean off mid yell and both brothers turned to the source of the noise. Stood in the doorway was a rumpled and exhausted looking Castiel. 

“I'm going to see what's going on in Heaven.” Sam said stiffly. 

“Sam-” 

“I need to make sure Raphael and the others can’t find us now that you’ve put us all in danger.” Sam interrupted. It was a terrible excuse but Dean let it slide because he was too emotionally drained to fight now. Plus he could hardly carry on yelling in front of Castiel. Sam shot him one last look before disappearing on the spot.

“I didn't hear any of your conversation if that is what you are concerned about.” Castiel said walking over to the table and sitting down opposite Dean.

“I wasn’t thinkin’ about that Cas.” Dean lied. Castiel shrugged as if he didn’t believe Dean but didn’t press the matter.

“Why is there blood on the table?” He asked looking down at the table with a frown. Dean looked down to his hand which had already healed apart from a few cuts. All that remained was the drying blood and the glass shards.

“I held onto my glass too tight I guess.” Dean said shrugging. “Sam and I didn't wake you did we?” He asked noting Castiel's dark circles. 

“No...I was awake. I guess I'm finding it difficult to sleep now.” Castiel said. Without him having to ask Dean slid an intact glass towards Castiel along with the bottle. Castiel shot him an appreciative look and poured himself a liberal shot of whiskey. “Thank you. Why are you awake at this time?”

“Angels don't really need to sleep. It's ok to do sometimes if you're bored but apart from that we don't really get tired unless we’ve been hurt.”

“Oh.” Castiel said nodding though Dean had the feeling there was more on the man's mind than that. Castiel drained his glass and poured himself another shot. ”Must be nice I guess.”

“You must be pretty tired though. Humans need their eight hours and shit like that right?” Dean asked. 

“I became used to not sleeping in Hell so I’ve got used to not sleeping for long now.” Castiel said shrugging absentmindedly. “I didn't say that to get your pity by the way. I merely assumed that you would have less to say on the matter than my brothers or Anna.” He added fixing Dean with a piercing look. Everything had been so rushed or confusing before that Dean never noticed how freaking blue Castiel’s eyes were.

“Dude if you don't want my pity then I won't give it you.” Dean said in an attempt to stare right back at Castiel. Dean couldn't help but wonder if Castiel ever tried just staring a creature in the eyes, the intensity of his gaze was off to gank anything. 

“Thank you…I think anyway.” Castiel said finally looking away. “Can I ask you a question?” he asked after a few moments of silence. 

“That depends on the question...”

“It's about why you pulled me from Hell.” Castiel said. Shit, of all the things the guy could of asked it had to be about that. Then again it was kind of the main thing Dean assumed Castiel would ask about so it was hardly surprising. “Zachariah mentioned my prayers...I didn't think anyone heard them.”

“Well I did.” Dean muttered.

“You? You were the one to hear them?” Castiel asked. 

“Yeah...it's because...well it's a long story but the ending is that I heard your prayers.” Dean said because he couldn't get into his past right now. “That's why I saved you.”

“But I woke up alone.” Castiel said. “I woke up by my grave completely alone and had to find my own way to Anna’s house.”

“Yeah well I had a tail on me and it was either drop you off back with your body or drag your soul around the country while a bunch of assholes chased after me.” Dean said, scatching the back of his neck with nerves. 

“Demons were after you?” Castiel said. 

“Think other end of the spectrum.” Dean said. “The halo squad were pissed at me for pulling you out.”

“Heaven is angry I was pulled from Hell?” Castiel's face was full of even more questions. Dean could tell this was going to be a long night. 

“You were down there a long time. Zachariah has ways of making deals with people down there. We didn't know how much you'd been twisted by him. You could have been beyond saving.” Dean explained. 

“You thought the same as them?”

“No, I was one of the only ones determined to get you outta there.” Dean said and Castiel fell silent again. Dean wasn't really sure if that was a good thing or not.

“About Zachariah...”

“You want to know why he could get into your house...well Red's house.” At least he wasn’t asking about Hell, Heaven or the angels anymore.

“Yes. He is a demon is he not? He's a torturer in Hell and has black eyes, he has to be a demon.”

“The wards in your friend's house only protected you from full demons, not demon-angel hybrids.”

“He was a what?”

“Zachariah was an angel. He fell though during The Great Fall and ended up in Hell as chief torturer and asshole.” Dean said. “He still retains some of his angelic grace but it's been twisted by demon powers over the centuries. He's not an angel but he's not a demon either.” Dean said shuddering at the thought of Zachariah’s twisted grace. “You can say it if you want.” He added noting Castiel’s horrified look.

“Say what?”

“That it's fucked up. Because it is, it is fucked up.”

“Ok yes, it is fucked up.” Castiel said draining his glass again. He reached for a spare glass and poured a drink which he handed to Dean. “I think that if I sleep I might think of my time down there.”

“Down in Hell?” Dean asked. Castiel nodded his head sagely and poured yet another drink. “Getting smashed might not help.”

“I have a very high tolerance for alcohol.” Castiel shot back. “I have more questions.”

“I'd think you were dumb as fuck if you didn't.” Dean said. He could acknowledge Castiel's questions but that didn't mean he'd have to answer them. 

“For the moment I'll settle on knowing that you are indeed Danyael as well as Zachariah's true identity.”

“Dude that name...just call me Dean and believe me, you know enough about Zachariah.” Dean said. The sooner Castiel stopped calling him Danyael the better. 

“Except how to kill him, I am assuming my gun wouldn't work." Castiel said. 

“No, only an angel blade call kill him.” Dean said. “You'll get your chance to kill him. I promise you that.” 

“That's not really a thing for which you thank someone for but thank you.”

“He tortured you in Hell. I'd want to kill the one who caused me pain.” 

“Like the angels who hunted you.” Castiel said. It was a statement, not a question. Clearly Castiel was starting to understand Dean a bit more. 

“Yeah, I suppose so.” Dean said finally drinking his whiskey. 

“Can I ask another question?” Castiel asked after a few moments of silence.

“Like I said, it depends on the question.” 

“This cabin, how did you come by it?” Well at least that was an easy question Dean could answer.

“My leader, my garrison and I built it. It was a safe place for my garrison when they needed it.” Dean explained. “The garrison was larger back then...we've lost some over time.” He added as his chest began to tighten. Ok maybe it wasn’t such an easy question to answer.

“I am sorry. How did you become in charge of a garrison? You said your leader built the cabin.” Dean was right, this was definitely going to be a long night. 

“It's not my garrison. Not really. I was Michael's general and when he left he gave me control of the garrison.”

“And Sam?” Ok clearly none of Castiel’s questions were going to be easy to answer.

“Sam...Sam's story is slightly different.” Dean said cagily.

“How so?”

“It really isn't my place to talk about it. It's my brother's story to tell, not mine.” Dean said quickly regretting saying anything. “Got any more question?”

“None you will answer.” Castiel said and Dean actually liked how Castiel was beginning to understand the sort of person Dean was. 

“You should get some sleep. It might do you good.” Dean said. 

"Yeah, I suppose that you're right." Castiel said with a nod of his head. "Goodnight Dean."

"Goodnight Castiel."

Dean watched as Castiel rose from his seat and left the room. He had saved this man from unbearable pain in Hell because it had been the right thing to do, the good thing to do but now he was being hunted for it. He could only stay in the cabin for so long and the thought that he could soon die terrified to his core. He'd fought for so long and with such determination that he simply couldn't give up, not when he had a family to protect and not when Castiel needed him. He had fought for so long, he couldn't bow out now.

For the first time in a long time he slept that night.

-

_You Better Hope and Pray_

He was awoken in the morning by the sound of a ward going off. Someone had stepped onto the property and that someone wasn’t human. Dean leapt from the chair he’d been sleeping in, thanking God in the process for making it impossible for angels to get cricks in their necks, and rush outside before anyone else could. He stopped suddenly when he saw who it was that had trespassed onto the property. “Zophiel?” he asked warily as he looked down at the angel there in the clearing in front of the cabin.

The short slender girl stood in front of him without a weapon, at least a weapon Dean could see, and seemed to be almost shaking with fear. Her previously pristine outfit was covered in dry dirt and a dark red stain that looked suspiciously like dried blood. The religious cheerleader wanting a better life had certainly fallen far from the pyramid.   

“I am not here to harm you so please just put your weapon away.” Zophiel said raising her hands in surrender. Dean's grip on his blade loosened but he did not sheath his weapon. “Danyael I’m not even armed and I’m not going to hurt you. I understand that our last meeting did not go well but believe me when I say that I’m not going to harm you.” Zophiel added with a voice laced with desperation. There was something she was not telling him, he could see it in her face which had a pained quality to it. Her mannerisms where steadily making Dean feel uneasy.

“Zophiel what are you doing here?” Dean asked. The change in her from just a few days ago was dramatic. Never mind the change to her once clean clothing, her body movements were skittish and there were visible shakes coming from her hands. Even if she wanted to strike Dean she probably wouldn’t have been able to hold her blade properly. “How did you even find this place? No one outside my garrison knows about this place.”

“I…Jo told me about this place a long time ago. When she left she came here for a while before moving on.”

“What?” Dean asked as his stomach dropped at the mention of Jo’s name. There had been a time when Zophiel and Jo had been close but that had been before…before everything.

“She told me never to tell you but it’s probably the only way you will trust me.”

“Why are you here?” Dean pressed. If needed he could kill Zophiel in seconds but her uneasy behaviour made him curious about why she was here.

“I come with a message from Raphael.” Zophiel finally said. They way her voice broke on the final few words did nothing to help Dean’s unease. Something was definitely going on and Dean knew he wasn’t going to like it. His postured stiffened at the mere mention of Raphael's name. The last message he'd received from Raphael was an order to kill Castiel, Dean had defied that order so a message from Raphael really wasn't what he wanted to hear right now.

“If it’s a message from Raphael I'm not putting my weapon away.” Dean spat. “So Raphael sends his little carrier pigeon down instead of giving me the message himself?” Dean asked looking Zophiel up and down.

“I have to follow orders or I’ll end up being killed or worse. I don’t want to do this though.” Zophiel said. As soon as the words slipped out her mouth Zophiel looked stricken. “I did not mean that. I mean that my orders are my orders and I have to follow them.” Zophiel stammered out with wide eyes. Zophiel was a warrior, a fierce warrior, and here she was shaking and stammering.

 “So what is his message?” Dean spat out as his patience was slowly wearing thin, and it had been incredibly thin to begin with. As the angel made to move closer towards him Dean’s shoulders, along with his wings, went rigid.

“You’ve become very jumpy since you freed Castiel Novak.” Zophiel remarked. Before it would have been a remark full of mockery but now it sounded almost wistful.

“I’ve had dickheads trying to kill me since I freed him. That would make anyone jumpy.” Dean shot back not even bothering to comment on how Zophiel’s appearance and mannerisms were making him jumpy. “What’s this message then?” Dean asked.  

“This is his way of sending a message.” Zophiel said as she pressed a single object into Dean's hand. “If it’s any consolation I wish I didn’t have to do this. We were friends in Heaven before she left and if you can then please save her. _Save her_.”

“Save her? Zophiel what the fuck is going on?” Dean asked not even looking down at the item Zophiel placed in his hand.

“Save her if you can.” Zophiel pressed. Before Dean could say another word Zophiel vanished and it were as if he had never been in the room. Dean finally looked down at the object in his hand and had to fight the strong sense to vomit when he realised what he was holding. A feather, ripped forcefully from an angel's wing, sat on his palm. It wasn't the angle that the feather was bent at or even the splattering of blood on the feather's tip that sent bile up to Dean's throat, it was the fact that he recognised the feather instantly; after all he would know the feather of a member of his own garrison anywhere.

The feather was long and sleek, iridescent with a light tan tint, and Dean had seen those feathers flared out in anger, in joy and even in battle for eons. He could have mapped out every single millimetre of the feather from memory because it belonged to his family. The feather had been ripped from his own family’s wings.

Even though it freaked Castiel and his family out when he did so Dean flew back into the house, not caring about Castiel or Gabriel's preferences in the moment as it saved time. Sam was sat at the table with Samandriel and Anna as they poured over ancient looking books. As soon as Dean appeared in the room Castiel looked up from where he was sat on the couch with Adam, a worried expression setting in his face when he saw the wild look in Dean's eyes.

“Dean? What is it? Is it Zachariah or-” Castiel started to say but Dean raised a hand silencing him as he turned to look at his brothers.

“Raphael has Jo.” He said and the reactions were instantaneous. Adam leapt up from the couch while the book in Sam was holding slipped from his hands and landed loudly on the floor.

“What? How did he possibly find her? We’ve been looking for her for _years_!” Adam asked.

“I don't know how he found her but he has her.” Dean said

“How do you know?” Adam pressed. 

“The bastard sent one of his little fucking messenger birds with one of Jo's feathers.” Dean said holding up the feather. Sam grimaced at the sight of the blood splatter.

“You guys have birds in your control? Is that why the pigeons in New York are such assholes?” Gabriel asked walking into the room holding a giant sandwich in his hands. The desire to rip it from Gabriel’s hands and throw it in his face was unbelievable.

“Dean doesn't mean actual birds. Raphael uses lower stature angels to send his messages. Who did his send?” Sam asked.

“Zophiel.” Dean said trying to hold back bile yet again. Adam swore viciously and slammed a fist against the wall.

“He’s sick, that twisted arrogant bastard is a sick and twisted asshole. Zophiel might be one of his little lackeys but she and Jo were good friends in Heaven, Zophiel was horrified when Jo left. They fought together with Michael for years and they were friends. How twisted can Raphael get?” Adam snarled.

“We all know he’s an asshole but us standing here talking about it isn't going to help us find Jo.” Dean said.

“You can't be thinking of going to where Raphael is and finding her are you?” Sam questioned.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Adam snarled.

“Adam-” Sam tried to stay but Adam cut him off.

“No Sam, this is _Jo_.” Adam said firmly. “She’s our family Sam! She’s our family and not just in the bullshit angelic terms either. She fought alongside us for several millennia. She mourned with us during every heartbreak we had to go through. Who gives a _fuck_ if Raphael is there? She’s our family and we love her, we can’t leave her there just because this might be a trap or some shit like that.” The look Adam then threw Dean was one of fierce determination. “If you don’t save her Dean then I’ll go. Raphael doesn’t want me dead half as much as he wants you dead. I’ll go and save her if you won’t!”

“Adam I’m not going to let you go instead of me.” Dean said placing a hand on the younger angel’s shoulder.

“Dean there’s every likelihood that this is a trap. Raphael could have had that feather for God only knows how long and is using it now as bait. He might not even have Jo.”  

“We can’t risk that Sam. Adam is right. This is Jo; of course I'm going to find her!” Dean snapped. “I don't give a shit if God himself is there and wants to smite me; I'm not going to lose Jo…I’m not going to lose her _again_.” Dean said as his mind went back to the last time he had seen Jo.

_The woman stood in front of him wasn’t the cool and collected woman he’d known since the very beginning. Her whole body was shaking and her face was that of a broken woman. This wasn’t the Jo he’d fought alongside for as long as he could remember._

_“Jo?” Dean asked rising from his seat to walk towards his friend. Instead of welcoming his arms she held up her hands to stop him._

_“No…I can’t do this anymore…I can’t…I can’t live this life anymore” Jo cried still shaking from head to toe. “It’s not even a life! We’re not living and I feel as though I’m suffocating being kept here! I am_ suffocating _!”_

_“What…what are you saying Jo?”_

_“I’m saying that I can’t stay here any longer. I have to leave.”_

_“You’re going to f-”_

_“No…no I just need to leave. I need to leave and find some purpose outside of Heaven…outside of the garrison. I need to find my purpose in life Dean or there’s no point living. There’s no point having all this grace…and this power and not do anything with it. We fight, we serve and we protect but we don’t_ feel _. I need to feel.”_

_“There’s nothing I can say to change your mind is there?” Dean asked even though he knew the answer to that question. He knew Jo’s mind was set and that she would leave as soon as she could. She was an extraordinary woman and one of Dean’s closest friends, he knew her inside out, so he knew once her decision had been made there was no changing it even if it hurt._

_“No…I’m sorry, I’m so sorry but I have to find who I am then I’ll come home.”_

_“You better promise me that or I’ll come down to Earth and drag you back here.”_

_“Please, I could kick your ass without even trying.” Jo said grinning despite the sadness of the moment._

_“I wish you weren’t leaving.” Dean said. He wanted to beg Jo not to leave, he wanted her to stay and carry on being there for him but he knew he couldn’t ask that of her because it was beyond selfish. He had to let her leave. “You better find yourself as quickly as you can and get back home or I’m going to be pissed.”_

_“I’m going to miss you.” Jo said finally bringing her body into Dean’s arms and wrapping her own around Dean’s chest. “Stay safe ok? I want to come home to my leader.” Jo added. Dean pressed himself closer to her to deepen the hug until the pressure around his chest disappeared._

_Jo was gone._

“Dean we’re not going to lose her again.” Adam said with a firm and determined voice snapping Dean out of his memory. “Dean we’re not going to lose her again ok?” Dean hoped that Adam was right. Praying didn’t seem like the sane thing to do because who would answer? Hope though; hope was something no one could take away from him because it was going to keep him strong. He had to keep strong because Jo could become one of the loved ones that he had lost. She just couldn’t.


End file.
